


Summer for Suckers

by mendeshoney



Category: Shawn Mendes (Musician)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hockey, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2018-12-05
Packaged: 2019-09-12 10:05:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 31,521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16870951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mendeshoney/pseuds/mendeshoney
Summary: Shawn is your older brother’s best friend. He’s living with you and your older brother for the summer, and he’s completely gone for you. He makes a bet…a stupid bet.





	1. Chapter 1

A knock on your bedroom door makes you set your book down beside you on your bed, sitting up and saying “Come in!” while you swing your legs off the side of your bed, already getting up and moving to the door when Gabe comes through, laughing and pulling you into a bear hug. He’s slightly sweaty, most likely from hauling his large duffel from his car into the house in the summer heat, but you hug him back all the same, face squished against his chest.

“Hey Guppy.” He says. The childhood nickname makes you cringe, but because you haven’t seen him for four months you allow it just this once. When you part, he takes an appreciative look around your room that your dad recently redid. He got rid of the baby pink paint and replaced it with a nice ivory, coupled with a new ivory bed frame, new ivory sheets and duvet, and you had taken away your childhood and high school posters, replacing it with one large white and gold tapestry on your large wall, hanging polaroids and other pictures on another wall with string and clothespins.

“It suits you,” Gabe says. “Now that you’ve grown up, I guess.”

“Dad wanted it to feel like a college dorm,” you say, “but without the communal bathrooms and shitty central air and heat.”

You decided that you’d be attending your local university, a school that was less than an hour away and would allow you to commute. You graduated about three weeks ago, so your dad took the liberty of remodeling your room to accommodate the change. He also redid Gabe’s room, and pretty much every bedroom in the house.

“Did you see-”

“Yes.” Gabe cuts you off, his tone indicating that he didn’t really appreciate the royal blue walls of his room, which you figured he wouldn’t. Anything that wasn’t Boston University Red was a no go. His Terrier pride ran deep. “It’s atrocious, but it doesn’t matter. Did they get to Aruba okay?”

You nod, taking a step out into the hallway and looking over the railing, down at the open living room. Shawn is hauling all of his and Gabe’s luggage into the room - Gabe making him do all the work as usual - and you give him a little wave. “They got in two days ago. Mom loves it, Dad’s happy to just relax and work on the beach instead of in his office. Their typical second honeymoon routine.”

Gabe hums, and you both watch Shawn haul the last of their belongings in. You and Gabe were alone in the house this summer, as it had been every summer since Gabe graduated high school. Your parents would go to Aruba and spend the entire summer there, celebrating their marriage and leave the two of you to your own devices, leaving enough money behind to last until they got back. Not that you and Gabe didn’t have jobs of your own, but more that they wanted to be sure you had emergency funds.

This summer was going to be slightly different, what with Shawn staying with you and Gabe for the duration of it. Shawn had lived with you before as well during a summer way back when. His family often went to London in the summer to visit his mother’s relatives, but this year Shawn opted out of going. He didn’t feel like being in Europe any longer, having just been abroad the entirety of this past school year. 

He insisted he come home and spend time with you and Gabe - as if Gabe wasn’t with him abroad - and his parents agreed, your parents also agreeing because they love Shawn - he’s like the second son they never had, and they wouldn’t dare tell him no.

Shawn can feel your eyes on him and looks up at the two of you, holding his arms open as if to say “what the fuck.” He laughs to show he’s not really mad, then says “You two just watching me work? Not even gonna offer help?”

“No.” You and Gabe say simultaneously. You give Shawn a playful smile and he responds with one of his own.

“You’re strong enough for the both of us.” Gabe tells him, shooting him a wink.

Shawn goes to retaliate when the sound of a rumbling engine and loud music blaring down the street approaches your driveway. The sound cuts off and is replaced with the rambunctious laughter of boys, and you look to Gabe, raising a brow.

“Gabe?” You ask, a warning tone in your voice. You know what he’s going to say, but you’re hoping he doesn’t say it.

He scratches the back of his head, expression sheepish. “Well, we haven’t seen him all year, and Shawn and I just thought-”

“You thought you’d ruin my summer?” You interject, punching him in the shoulder.

Confirming your suspicions, three large boys tumble through the front door, sunglasses on their faces and at the front of the group is the bane of your entire existence.

“What’s up losers!” Jacob shouts, announcing his arrival.

You groan aloud, turning back into your room, and Gabe follows you, shutting the door quietly behind him.

“ _Really Gabe?!_ ” You demand, gesturing to the door, and to where the  _heathen_  lies on the other side.

“I know, but listen,” he says, hands up in defense. “Shawn and I haven’t seen him and our friends all year, and they’re not staying here at the house. They’re just-”

“Going to be here nearly every fucking day, eating our food, and raiding mom and dad’s liquor cabinet?” You spit. The last one makes something flash behind Gabe’s eyes, and he frowns at you.

“I know you don’t like him, but I promise Shawn and I will make sure he doesn’t bother you, and Mathew and Cody are nice.”

“If they’re anything like Jacob they are the farthest thing from  _nice_.”

Gabe sighs, running a hand through his dark hair. “Can you just…try not to be a bitch and I’ll tell Jacob to try not to be an asshole?”

“Me?” You ask in disbelief, shoving him. His eyes open wide in surprise at how much distance you manage to put between the two of you. “I shouldn’t be a bitch to your stupid friend who almost got you in trouble? Who’s never done anything but be a shitty friend to you the entire time you’ve known him? Oh yeah sure, I’ll keep that in mind.” You avoided Gabe’s eyes, the sting of him calling you a ‘bitch’ causing tears to well up, but you refused to cry. You looked at the time on your apple watch and moved to your closet, grabbing your tie dye work shirt and putting on socks and your low top white Converse shoes.

“Where are you going?” Gabe sighs.

You glare at him, shoving your phone in the back pocket of your shorts and grabbing your backpack. “I have work at noon.” You say shortly, grabbing your car keys off the hook on the wall and shoving past him, throwing your door open and heading down the stairs. Jacob, and who you assume to be Mathew and Cody are in the backyard, and to avoid them you quickly head out to your car, bumping into a large body on the way.

You pull back and rub at where your head hit a chest full of solid muscle, and look up at Shawn, whose hand flies to your forehead, replacing yours.

“Sorry about that.” He murmurs, thumb rubbing in soothing strokes. “Also, sorry about Jacob. I thought Gabe would’ve told you sooner.”

“It’s fine,” you offer, hands holding the strap of your backpack. “He’s your friend and I’m the insignificant sister who just stays here. It doesn’t matter.”

Shawn frowns at that, hands moving on their own accord as he begins to run his fingers through your hair. “Don’t say that. That’s not true. And you know Gabe and I won’t let him bother you.” He pauses for a second, looking at your backpack and the tie dye shirt in your hand. “Where are you going?”

“Work.” You say. “At King Cone.”

Shawn chuckles. “You work there?”

Now it’s your turn to frown. “For your information, I love it there. Now if you’ll excuse me.” You motion your eyes to where his hand is playing with a strand of your hair, and he winces like he’s been shocked with electricity, taking a step back and moving out of your way.

“Sorry,” he says quietly, and all but jogs out to the backyard.

You head out and slam the door behind you, completely unaware that Gabe just witnessed your entire exchange with Shawn, a puzzled look on his features. Tossing your backpack and shirt into the passenger seat, you blast the AC and head to your job, the ice cream/drive in style place that’s been a staple in your town for ages.

When you pull into the lot, you see Morgan’s car, letting you know that her and Kayla are already here, you also see Kappy’s jeep, accompanied with Willy’s bodyboard sticking out of the back, and Zach and Jimmy’s motorcycles. You can’t help but smile to yourself, knowing that this was going to be a good opening shift - the exact thing you needed after you just learned your perfect summer had been compromised.

You go in through the employee entrance in the back, putting your backpack into your cubby before stripping off your shirt, replacing it with your tie dye work shirt and throwing your long hair up into a messy bun.

Willy comes around the corner then, and smiles immediately when he sees you, awakening something wicked within your core, and then he’s rushing you and pulling you into a tight hug.

“Welcome home Will,” you laugh, hugging him in turn, your high school crush on him coming back full force, memories of your agreement before he left reappearing in your mind. “How was Sweden?”

“Terrible, Finland was better.” A voice from behind you says. You tear away from Will and giggle excitedly as you hug Kasperi, his girlfriend Annie standing behind him, who you hug next, her long blonde ponytail tickling your nose.

The four of you were inseparable in high school, and right after graduation the three of them left to spend a week in Europe - visiting Will’s family in Sweden, then visiting Kappy’s family in Finland, and Annie had gone with. Now that they were back, you’re starting to feel a little bit better about summer, and with the way Willy’s blonde hair and blue eyes looked, you were thinking maybe this summer would be a good time to start a new kind of friendship with him.

You check your assignment for the day and feel extreme relief when you read “dine in cashier” under your name, and notice that it says so under Annie’s as well, meaning that Will and Kappy are your runners for food orders if people choose to come inside and eat. You take note that Morgan, Kayla, Zach, and Jimmy are assigned to the “drive in,” meaning that they have to rotate being cashier and making orders for people who walk up to the window to order food. Better them than you, because the drive in window is always crazy during the summer.

You clock in and head to the register, helping Annie out with the already growing lunch rush line, even though King Cone just opened ten minutes ago.

The more people who come in, the faster the time passes, and as it gets closer to four o’clock, you have about an hour left until your shift is over. You turn to say something to Annie, trying to see if maybe she wants to hang out after work when another customer comes through the door, making the bell chime. Annie greats them with the usual “Hi Welcome to King Cone! How can we help you?”

“Actually I was wondering if  _she_  could help?”

Your body turns, smiling softly when you see Shawn standing there, hands in his pockets, wearing a black shirt that clings to his muscles, and a shy grin on his face, cheeks rosy from the heat outside. “Shawn, hey,” you greet him. “What are you doing here?”

He shrugs, approaching the counter. “Haven’t been here in a long time. Since you love it so much I wanted to see what you’d recommend? I’m starving.”

You raise a brow in suspicion. “There’s food at the house.”

“Yeah, but what’s summer in Pickering without a stop to King Cone for ice cream and greasy food? Besides, I’ve been in Europe for a year, gimme the good stuff.”

You roll your eyes, but punch in your favorite order - coconut chicken tenders with duck sauce, curly fries, and a side of mozzarella sticks, and campfire s’mores ice cream for dessert. Shawn hands you a twenty and you give him his change, receipt complete with order number, and he tosses a wink your way as he goes to sit to wait for his order.

When you turn back to Annie, she’s smirking at you, hand on her hip and her head gesturing to where Shawn’s sitting. “So, Mendes is with you for the summer again?”

You roll your eyes. “And your point is?”

“If we were thirteen again, my point would be nothing. But now that we’re eighteen and he’s what, twenty one? Gonna be a senior in college? My point is that he got fucking hot and you’ve got him to yourself all summer.”

You take a glance in his direction, giving him a once over and acknowledging that yeah, Shawn was no longer lanky, brace faced, or weird. He’d grown up - gotten a lot taller, filled out with rock hard muscle, jawline more defined, curly hair giving him that boyish yet manly charm - yeah, he was hot, but also “But that’s  _Shawn_. That’s Gabe’s best friend. I’ve watched him pop pimples and get shit stuck in his braces.”

“So? Do you see pimples on that flawless skin? Braces on his pearly whites? No.  _And_ he just rolled right on in here and asked for your recommendation based on what  _you_  love. Not to mention he asked for you to help him specifically, and he stared at your ass before you turned around. If I were you? I’d get on that train. Or are you still stuck on Will?”

At the mention of his name you hit her shoulder lightly, but Will clearly isn’t listening, if the way he’s shouting at Kappy about something over the music is any indication. “I am not  _stuck_  on him.”

“He talked about you all vacation, you know.” Annie says, leaning on the counter. “How he couldn’t wait to get home to see you.” At this, you blush, and she raises a brow. “He mentioned something about…a promise?”

_So he did remember._

Will was your prom date, and it was clear leading up to prom and after that he was starting to feel  _something_  for you, and you’d been into him since you were sixteen. But for some reason you two couldn’t quite get your footing, too wrapped up in graduating and college things. The day before graduation he promised you that when he got back from Sweden, the two of you would give it a shot, and you were hoping he didn’t forget, and thanks to Annie, now you know he didn’t.

“Wanna tell me what that’s all about?” Annie asks, and you shake your head. She leans in closer, lowering her tone as she says “Well, even so. I say if things don’t work out, getting under Shawn to get over Will wouldn’t be such a bad idea.”

You huffed, reaching behind her when you see Willy’s arm stick out from the kitchen, Shawn’s order in a brown bag, stapled together at the top. Will gives you a shy smile before ducking back into the kitchen, and you try not to read too much into it, calling Shawn’s number. He strides right over to you, taking the bag from your hand, but not before brushing his fingers against yours.

“Thanks honey,” he says. “See you at home.”

He’s always called you honey - he calls a lot of girls honey, it’s just a thing he does - but at the pet name Annie kicks your foot with hers, and you pointedly ignore it, smiling at Shawn and waving goodbye as he leaves.

“You’re insane.” You tell Annie. Going to the back to grab another stack of napkins for the front even though the canister is full. In truth, you’re trying to figure out why your skin is still tingling from where Shawn’s skin brushed yours.

Thankful to have your first shift of the summer over, you head back to the cubbies, clocking out with a satisfied sigh. You take your tie dye shirt off and stuff it in your backpack before digging out your shirt from earlier and shrugging it back on, along with the hoodie you packed earlier. Zipping up your backpack and throwing it over your shoulder, you grab your car keys and turn to head out, when you run right into Willy, Kappy, Zach, and Jimmy flanking him from behind.

Something about the look on Willy’s face stuns you and makes you take a step back. “What?” You ask.  _Did they just watch me change?_

Willy smirks, crossing his arms across his chest and leaning in the doorway. “What are you doing right now?”

“Why?” You say shakily, and Zach laughs at the distrust in your voice.

“Wanna go to the beach?” Willy asks, making a grand gesture to the group. “We’re all going. Like us guys and the girls.”

“But aren’t half of you working till close?”

Kappy shakes his head. “Nope, another group is coming in right now and they’re going till close. So what do you say?”

Annie pops her head out from somewhere behind the boys. “It’ll get you out of the house.” She mouths ‘and into Willy’s pants’ at you, which you pointedly ignore.

You debated for a bit, but ultimately agreed. Anything to prevent you from spending time with Jacob was good enough, especially if it meant spending more time with Will. You made plans to have Willy and Kappy come pick you up from you house, giving you time to get changed into your bathing suit and grab a towel and extra change of clothes for after.

You’re changing into your one piece suit, a red baywatch looking piece with a high cut in the front and low dip into the back that stops right above your butt. You’re hoping that it’ll catch Willy’s eyes, and you couple it with a pair of high waisted black shorts and stuff your see through white long sleeve cover up into your backpack.

A text alert pops up on your apple watch that lets you know that Willy and Kappy are downstairs, and just as you go to grab your backpack, there’s a knock on your door before Shawn opens it, and he stops dead in his tracks, openly eyeing your body.

A quiet ‘ _woah, have mercy_ ’ leaves his lips, and you smirk a bit, thinking ‘well if Shawn likes it Willy definitely will too.’

“Can I help you?” You say, noticing the spaced out look in his eyes and the way they slowly drag back up to your face, staring at you.

“Where are you going?”

You laugh. “That’s the second time you’ve asked me that today. I’m going to the beach with a few friends.”

You move past Shawn and step out to the hall, looking over the railing and seeing Gabe and Cody sitting on the couch, Mathew and Jacob nowhere to be seen.

“Be home later,” you say to Gabe, heading down the stairs with Shawn trailing behind you.

“But we got dinner,” Shawn says, the same time that Gabe says “Where the fuck are you going looking like that?”

You toss Gabe the finger, turning to Shawn to say, “Thanks, but I’ll eat in a bit.” You toss a wink in for effect, and watch Shawn’s adam’s apple bob as he gulps down a breath.

You open the door and head out to Willy’s Jeep, pulling yourself up onto the step and hauling yourself into the passenger seat next to him. As Willy backs out of your driveway, you take point of an angry looking Shawn standing in the doorway, knowing that because of the lack of doors on Willy’s jeep, he can see the way that Will’s hand snakes onto your thigh, and he looks none too pleased.


	2. Chapter 2

It’s a lot cooler now and well into the night when Willy drives you home, and you’re thankful when you see that the lights in the house are off, meaning you don’t have to deal with Shawn or your brother harassing you.

You turn to Willy to say thank you and he’s already smiling at you, one hand on the wheel, the other arm behind your seat. Your heart beats a little - you’ve been flirting with Will all night, and you guys talked about prom (where he was your date, but nothing happened that night) and his recent trip. Sadly, you didn’t talk about the promise he made you before he left, but you figured it was because he wanted to wait to do it in private.

He walked with you on the sand, even bought a pizza strictly for the two of you to share. You exchanged innocent touches and looks and you knew without a doubt that when he drove you home, he’d probably kiss you before you got inside.

And your suspicions were about to be confirmed. Willy leans across the console, giving you plenty of time to pull back, but you don’t. You meet him halfway, his soft lips meeting yours and the kiss is everything you pictured it to be - soft, sweet, gentle, but no immediate fireworks - and Willy moves his hands, one cupping the side of your face and the other tangling into your ponytail.

You don’t notice the lights in the house turn on, or the front curtains moving, but you do hear Shawn’s loud voice saying “Oh good! You’re home! Come inside! It’s cold out!”

Full of embarrassment, you and Willy jump apart, and you feel your face flush beet red, telling him “Thank you, I’ll see you tomorrow?”

He nods at you and waits for you to get safely on the ground, waving to you before glaring in Shawn’s direction, backing out and driving away.

You storm into the house and right past Shawn, heading straight to your room, but Shawn is hot on your heels. “What the fuck was that?” he whisper hisses at you. “Is that your boyfriend?”

“No, and thanks to you he might never be.” You spit. He shuts your room door behind him and crosses his arms across his chest, trying to be intimidating. “And I should be asking you what the fuck that was! Why did you have to be a cock block?”

“Are you having sex with him?”

You literally choke on your own spit. “Excuse me?! How is that any of your business?!”

“I’m assuming that’s why you dressed the way you did.”

You cannot  _believe_  this conversation is happening right now. “Listen asshole, I dress the way I want and I dress for myself, so fuck you very much. And besides, _you_  seemed to love the way that I was dressed, if I can recall correctly.”

Shawn is suddenly silent, and you remove your white cover up, standing in your high waisted shorts and red swimsuit again. “Am I wrong?” You ask, a burst of confidence surging through you as you look right into his eyes. “Is this not what you were staring at earlier?”

You watch his Adam’s apple bob as he takes a deep breath, and before you can say another thing, one of his large hands lands on your ass, pulling you flush against him as he presses a rough kiss to your lips, tilting your chin up with his other hand.

Your body lights up at the intensity, sparks flying behind your eyes and heart ready to beat out of your chest, something wicked pooling deep within you. He rolls his body against you, backing you against your closet door gently and groaning deep in his chest when he feels your hands snake into his hair, his lips opening up and tongue teasingly licking at your lips, asking for permission.

You open up, and he groans, lifting your legs and wrapping them around his waist, walking you backwards and laying you onto your bed. Shawn settles between your legs, his arousal evident as his hips roll against you, lips going to your neck as his hands begin to lower the straps of your swimsuit down your shoulders, your hands snaking up under his shirt, nails scratching at the taut muscles of his abdomen. He bites down on your skin and you moan aloud, rolling your hips upwards, looking for more friction, for him to just do  _something_.

It’s then that he suddenly backs away, body pulling off of you quickly and leaving you cold. His eyes are looking down at your floor when he says “I shouldn’t have done that. Don’t wanna upset your boyfriend.”

And with that, he backs out of your room, shutting the door behind him and leaving you breathless and needy - something you’re pointedly realizing that Willy’s kiss never did.

-

You wake up in the morning to the smell of Gabe’s famous waffles, knowing this is probably an apology of sorts for the whole Jacob thing. You change into a sports bra and lululemon shorts, throw your hair into a bun, and head downstairs to see he’s already made you a plate, accompanied with an egg white omelette and bacon strips, orange juice sitting in your usual blue cup. He smiles at you - his signature apology smile - and you just nod, taking a bite and eating in a comfortable silence with him as he takes the seat next to you, digging in.

That comfortable silence is broken when Shawn comes into the kitchen, and he makes a point to avoid your eyes at all costs. It hurts you a bit - the memory of last night coming back full force, how he left you hot and bothered in your room and how you had to take care of it yourself - and you swallow the last of your juice, throwing your dishes into the sink as you grab your phone from the counter, plugging in your headphones and going for a run to clear your head.

When you come back, Gabe and Shawn’s cars are gone from the driveway, and the house is empty. You take it upon yourself to blast your music as you shower and brush your teeth, changing into your work clothes, grabbing your bag and heading to work.

Willy’s waiting for you by the cubbies when you get in, planting a gentle kiss on your cheek and wrapping an arm around your waist, hugging you to his side. A pang of guilt hits you slightly, knowing that minutes after he kissed you, Shawn kissed you, and that if Willy knew he’d probably be none too pleased.

“How was the rest of your night?” He asks quietly, as to not draw attention from the others who are probably around the corner.

You shrug. “It was quiet,” you lie easily. “Went to bed.”

“What about that guy?” Willy asks, not wanting to be obvious, but obviously wanting to know who Shawn was. “Is he like…your boyfriend or something?” You try to push down the awkward bubble that fills in your stomach.  _Funny,_  you think.  _He said the same thing about you._

“Who, Shawn? He’s Gabe’s best friend. He’s staying with us for the summer - don’t worry, he was just being a pain in the ass.”

Will laughs a little, shoulders relaxing. “He does know that I’m not some creep, right?”

You offer a laugh of your own. “He knows, just ignore him.”

“Okay,” Willy starts, looking down at his feet before looking at you through his lashes. “So he won’t care if I take you out to dinner tonight? At six? Say…at the Beach Plum?”

You smile widely, leaning back against the cubbies. “Nope, he won’t care one bit.”

Will smiles at you, his dazzling Prince Charming smile, and leans in, giving you a quick peck on the lips before heading out and clocking in. You take a minute to gather yourself before following suit, heading out to start your shift as runner with Zach and Jimmy for the drive in window.

-

Will’s got a smile about a mile wide as he sits across from you at the Beach Plum, the sun is just barely starting to set in the distance, and the summer breeze is cooling against your heated skin as you sit on the outdoor patio. He’s wearing khaki shorts and a nice polo shirt, and you’ve opted for a sleeveless white romper, putting your hair up in its standard messy bun and wearing a simple necklace and earring combination.

Dinner and dessert were both delicious, and now you’re both engrossed in conversation. It’s not awkward or weird by any means, and you’re thankful, because you were a little worried that with you and Willy crossing the line a bit that things would be different, but they’re not. You and Will seem to be settling into the beginning of what you’re hoping is something good. He’s talking about his recent trip again - just funny stories about him and Kappy, cool things he did and he drops a “I wish you were there” a few times, which makes your heart soar a bit.

Movement behind his head distracts you as you see a head of curls sit down a few tables behind Will, the head of curls trying but failing to hide behind a menu, and sitting across from him is unmistakably Gabe, who doesn’t look in your direction once, but is questioning Shawn and his weird behavior.

“Everything okay?” Will asks, clearly sensing your attention is elsewhere.

“Yeah,” you answer, eyes going back to his face. “It’s Shawn.”

At that, Will’s jaw clenches a little. “What about him?”

“Him and my brother just sat down behind you, a few tables back. I think that they’re trying to crash our date.”

Will turns not so discreetly, eyes narrowing at where Shawn is peeking at the two of you from behind his menu, before ducking away. When Will turns back to you, you expect him to be mad - you did tell him earlier that Shawn wasn’t a problem to deal with, yet here the problem was in the flesh.

“They’re a bit protective over you, aren’t they? Your brother and Shawn, I mean.”

You shrug a little, taking a sip of your water. “I mean, I guess so? They seem to forget I’m not a child anymore and that I can go on dates with guys I really like.”

Will’s eyes widen, full of hope. “You really like me?”

You giggle a little, leaning back in your chair. “Of course I do. I mean, I let you kiss me didn’t I? Why would I be here if I didn’t like you?”

“Dunno,” he says. “Maybe you just wanted a free dinner?”

That makes you laugh, and you see Shawn watching you from the corner of your eye. It annoys you that they’re spying on you like this, and you feel Will’s hand reach across the table, fingers lacing with yours. “Hey,” he says softly. “Let’s go pay out front, and maybe we’ll go to the boardwalk? Or we could go by the Shell? See if there’s live music playing? Does that sound okay?”

You nod, and he gets up and you follow suit, hands still intertwined as he leads you out of the restaurant. On the way out, as you’re about to pass Shawn and Gabe’s table, you grab a couple sugar packets from another table and chuck it at the boys, tossing a glare over your shoulder as they stare at you. Gabe looks surprised almost, as if he didn’t expect to see you.

As you leave with Will, Gabe slowly looks to Shawn, a disappointed look on his face as he says, “ _Dude._ ”

Shawn raises a brow in response. “What?”

“You made us come here so we could spy on my sister and her date?”

Shawn scrambles for an excuse, comes up with “No?”

Gabe rolls his eyes. “I don’t care who she dates, y’know. It’s not my business. I mean sure, do I like that she’s dating that kid? Not really, but I don’t see why you…” His voice trails off as he begins to put two and two together, eyes narrowing in realization that “Holy shit. You’re  _jealous_.”

“No I’m not! You saw how she dressed yesterday, and when she got home last night they made out in the driveway for like five minutes!”

“You waited up for my sister?”

Shawn pauses, voice trailing off when he says “No.”

Gabe scoffs. “You’re a shit liar Mendes. And I should be pissed as fuck that you’re looking at her like that, or that you’re jealous of the guys she’s out with. But considering that you’re my best friend I’m gonna let it slide for a minute and tell you - if whoever this kid she’s dating right now breaks her heart, you and I can kick the shit out of him together. But if you break her heart? I’m going to jail for your murder. Got it?”

-

You’re crawling out of your skin, feel like it’s a foreign body to you now. You thought you wanted to be intimate with Will, but the further you got, the more his hands roamed over your body, you were reminded with the way that Shawn had touched you - such a brief and fleeting moment, but one that for some reason every time Will tried to get close to you, you couldn’t help but shake.

Will had taken you to the boardwalk, and the two of you took your time, walking next to one another until you got to the end, and he backed you up against one of the poles, hands starting at your waist and roaming lower. And you loved it, there was no way you couldn’t. It had been everything you’d ever dreamt of - finally having Will’s attention, kissing him, flirting with him, him taking you on a date and wanting to go further with you - you’d wanted all of this since you turned sixteen and realized that you wanted to be more than friends with Willy.

But his lips, his hands, the aggression and passion he kissed you with - it was nothing compared to the way Shawn made you feel in a matter of seconds. And while you didn’t know what that meant, you knew it wasn’t good.

So you made an excuse, said something about not being ready and feeling dizzy, and Will took you home immediately. He wasn’t upset, he even apologized for being so forward, for not double checking that this was what you wanted too, and bless him for it, really, but for some reason you couldn’t shake the thought of Shawn, the way he looked at you, or the way he kissed you.

What the fuck.

How did this all change in a matter of twenty four hours?

Will hugs you gently, whispering a goodbye and pressing a kiss to your forehead before you head inside, watching him back out from behind the curtain covered window. Gabe, Shawn, Jacob, Mathew, and Cody are in the pool in the backyard - a firepit going and lights on, and drinks are definitely involved.

You make sure to head upstairs quietly, but you don’t know that Shawn already knows you’re home. He was closest to the sliding door and heard you come in, watched you watch Will pull away, and he wanted to go to apologize to you for intruding, for being a dick, but Cody shoved him in the pool before he could,

After you shower and change into your PJs, you climb into bed and trying to relax, trying not to think about Shawn, who’s just downstairs, but it’s no use.

And in truth, he’s thinking about you, too. Something about the look on your face when you got home makes him want to follow you upstairs, check on you, make sure that asshole blonde kid didn’t try anything stupid or piss you off.

“Hey Mendes!” Jacob calls out, walking over and handing Shawn a beer. “What’re you staring at?”

Shawn shrugs. “Kid just got home,” he says, figuring Jacob would know that he was referring to you. “Wanted to make sure she was okay.”

Jacob scoffs. “Since when do you care about that bitch?”

Shawn shoves him, frowning. “She’s not a bitch, dude. Plus, that shit was years ago, get over it.”

“I’ll get over it when I’m dead.” Jacob says. “Besides, you’re just living with her and Gabe, doesn’t mean you have to look after her. You’re not responsible for her.”

“Just because  _you_  don’t give a shit about her, doesn’t mean that I-”

“What are you, in love with her or something? Why does it matter to you all of a sudden that I don’t like Gabe’s little sister?”

Shawn grumbles, shoving Jacob to the side. Jacob goes flying into the patio door, and the commotion draws the attention of the other three boys.

“Hey!” Gabe calls out. “What the fuck!”

Jacob is angry when he says “Shawn’s got the hots for your bitch sister, apparently.”

Gabe rolls his eyes, approaching Jacob and jabbing a finger in his chest. “Jacob, why don’t you shove your zit sized grudge up your asshole and leave my sister alone. She’s blood, you’re not, and don’t forget - if I have to choose between our friendship and my sister? I’ll choose her. Everytime.” Gabe shoves Jacob behind him, pushing him in the direction of the other boys, before silnging an arm around Shawn’s shoulder, dragging him into the house. 

“And as for you, you already know that I  _will_ kill you if you hurt her. Right?”

Shawn nods, fist tightened and ready to launch themselves into Jacob’s nose. “I’m not going to.” He says. “I literally was looking to make sure that she got in okay. Jacob’s just a dick.”

“Yeah, I know.” Gabe says. “I get it, just try not to break the house, eh?”


	3. Chapter 3

You’re not sure how, but you’ve managed to get a whole week off of work, and you’re slightly thankful because you’re a little embarrassed at the way you left things with Willy, who you haven’t talked to since. You’ve spent most of your days off driving around this small town in your Jeep, parking it by the beach or off some wooden trail, sitting in the driver’s seat and just relaxing, listening to music and zoning out.

Anything to keep you out of the house and away from all the testosterone.

Today was going to be just like the last - you’ve got to go back in two days, and you were going to spend as much time to yourself as possible. You woke up earlier than Gabe and Shawn, the latter of the two whom you’ve been pointedly avoiding, getting showered, dressed, brushing your teeth and grabbing your backpack.

As you climb into your car, your phone buzzes in your back pocket with a text notification.

From Will.

**“can we go to breakfast when you wake up? I think we need to talk”**

You groan - this was the main thing you wanted to avoid, but you knew that you’d have to work with him the rest of the summer anyway, so you type out a quick reply.

**“Sure, where did you want me to meet you?”**

**“Vinny’s?”**

About ten minutes later, you pull into the parking lot of a small diner where you can see Will is already seated, two milkshakes in front of him. He waves at you from inside and you return the gesture, heading in and taking your seat across from him.

“I hope you don’t mind,” he says, gesturing to the drinks. “You said you like chocolate, right?”

You nod with a small smile. “Yeah, thanks Will.”

He nods, then leans back into the booth. With a sigh, he suddenly leans forward again, elbows on the table and says “I don’t know that I can do this.”

You raise your brow in suspicion. “Do  _what_?”

Again, he sighs. “I know that I promised you that when I got back we’d talk about the promise we made. About giving us a shot. And I know that a lot was happening back then, with all the flirting and prom and stuff, and it all kind of made it seem like you and I would eventually happen…but…but I don’t know that I want that?”

You don’t say anything, but he thinks it’s because you’re upset (which you’re not, not yet anyway), and so he reaches across the table, taking your hand in his. “I’ve been thinking these last few days, since we haven’t talked and I’ve come to realize a few things. I know that I like spending time with you, and that I want to do  _things_ , but since we’re going to differently schools in the fall, I don’t know that I’m ready or mature enough for a long distance relationship, or that I should even be in a serious relationship when I’m going to college and could be out having ‘fun.’”

That last part definitely hurts you, because you realize what he’s saying - he’s not even going to give it a chance, not going to give you a chance, but at the same time, yeah, you get why he wants to have “fun.” But you also understand that sometimes people just aren’t  _relationship_ people, and you can’t really be mad at Will for that.

Plus, he’s still your friend, and he’s always listened to you, never pushed you, stepped away when you asked him to, always respected you, and he tried so hard to impress you on that one date, treated you like a princess and made you laugh. But he’s always been that way.

So you let it go, no hard feelings.

“I understand.” You say.

He blinks at you in surprise. “What? You’re not mad?”

You shake your head. “No, I’m not. How could I be? And truthfully…that night, when I pushed you away, I think I knew I wasn’t ready for  _this_  to happen either.”

He nods at you, keeping your hand in his. “I really like you.” He says, tone sad. “I wish I could be what you deserve, but I don’t know that I’m worthy enough?”

“Worthy?” You ask, incredulous. “Will you’re my friend. One of my best friends. Of course you’re worthy.”

He shakes his head. “There’s a difference between being worthy of being a friend, and being worthy enough to be  _with_  you. I’m only one of those things. You’re so beautiful and smart and funny and kind, and I know that as your friend. I’d only take advantage of it as your boyfriend, and you don’t deserve that.”

There’s a certain air about his words and it makes you feel a little sad. You really wanted to be with Willy, but you also agree with him - not that he doesn’t deserve you, but that this definitely isn’t the right time for you both to be together, and you both obviously do not want  _this_ , whatever it may be, right now.

“Did we miss our window of opportunity?” You say, laughing to let him know that you’re okay.

Will giggles at you in response, his blue eyes twinkling a little, blonde hair shaking along with his body. “Maybe we did, and if we did then it’s definitely my fault. But maybe we’ll be ready in the future? You know? Oh god, is this the part where we make a pact that if we’re both single at the age of thirty then we’ll marry each other and have kids?”

You laugh. “I guess so.” His hand is still holding yours and you give it a squeeze. “Thanks for the summer so far, though. I liked spending time with you.”

“Liked?” He scoffs. “Don’t think you’re getting rid of me that easy. We still have a whole summer to spend together, and we’re still friends. I’ve still got plans for us, babe.”

-

You pull into your driveway, stomach full of chocolate shakes and blueberry pancakes Will convinced you to split with him. Despite the rest of your time being enjoyable and full of Will making you laugh, you can’t help but feel sad about it, but you don’t know why.

You wander into the living room, door shutting behind you and the echo brings to your attention just how quiet the house is. You hear Shawn call out your name before he enters the living room from the kitchen, and his eyes widen a little at your face.

“You okay?” He asks, concern lacing his words. He goes to take a step forward, but decides against it, staying put.

“I’m fine. Where’s Gabe? Or the boys?”

“Gabe went to do some yard work for some lady and the boys are over at Jacob’s house, so looks like it’s just us two.”

“Oh,” you say “okay…” Your voice trails off at the end, both you and Shawn suddenly realizing the last time both of you were alone together was when he kissed you, when he pushed you up against your closet door and touched you like he wanted more, like he needed more.

Shawn just stares at you, his own internal battle forming in his mind because he’s realizing that Gabe is right and he’s  _extremely_  jealous that you like that Will kid. He’s jealous because Will is just a boy and you need more than that. And if Gabe knew the thoughts that Shawn was having right now, he’d probably end up six feet under.

But Shawn can’t help it. Hasn’t been able to help these new feelings he has for you since Spring Break. He’s kept his feelings for you under wraps, has managed to because he hasn’t been around you, but now that it’s summer, and he’s living with you and Gabe, and he gets to see you everyday - soft and glowing in the morning, beautiful and radiant at night - his heart leaps out of his chest every time.

Shawn didn’t know he liked you till you came to Europe to visit Gabe. You had turned eighteen during winter break, so Gabe and Shawn took you to a few pubs, and you ended up being the “mom,” making sure both boys made it back safely.

His feelings slapped him in the face when he woke up and he saw you in their apartment kitchen the next morning, in your sleep shorts and old soccer shirt and your hair all messy making breakfast and thought  _“fuck I want her, I want this one and this one only for the rest of my life”_  and immediately after thinking this he knew that Gabe would kill him, that there was a possibility that you’d never like him back, and that he had to keep himself in check.

But since summer started literally only a week ago he’s been doing a terrible job.

“ _Shawn?_ ”

Your voice snaps him back to reality, and there it is again - that look on your face, the one you had when you came in. It’s still there and it’s breaking his fucking heart.

“What’s wrong?”

“You were staring,” you say, and he shakes his head.

“No not that, although I’m sorry if I was staring. I meant are you okay? You look a little glum.”

You shake your head at him. “I’m not, just full I guess. Was out with Will.”

At the name of the blonde boy, Shawn’s nostrils flare in anger, but he keeps himself in check. He also notices that when you say the blonde’s name, something flashes in your eyes and it has Shawn moving a little closer to you on instinct.

“How’d that go?” He asks.

You shrug your shoulders. “Alright I guess?”

“Wanna talk to me about it over a burger?”

You laugh, shaking your head. “I just ate.”

“Well…then how about you relax by the pool, and I’ll make myself a burger and listen?”

-

Shawn flips over the two burger patties on the grill, opening up the buns and toasting them on the top rack of the grill. You’re laying down in one of the cabana beds, the overhead shade up and shielding you from the summer sun. He started conversation, trying his best to make you feel a little more comfortable, and you were laughing and distracted, so he considered that mission accomplished thus far.

“So, what’s on your mind?” He asks when you stop laughing. “What happened with Will?”

“Oh,” you say, sighing a little. “We just went for lunch to talk about a few things.”

“Yeah?” Shawn asks, assembling his burger as he turns off the grill, taking a seat beside you on the bed. “How’d that go?”

“It uh, well,  _we_  didn’t work out. He and I kind of came to the conclusion that we’re better off as friends.”

A loud and resounding “YES” echoes in Shawn’s head, but he vocally tells you “Oh, I uh, I’m sorry to hear that.”

You scoff. “But are you?”

“Honestly?” Shawn says, putting his plate down on the little table beside the cabana bed. “No. He doesn’t deserve you.” He turns to look at you, leaning back a little. “I didn’t…I didn’t ruin it, right? Like…it wasn’t me?”

You laugh at that. “What do you mean?”

“It wasn’t because I like…stopped you from kissing, or because I crashed your date.”

“No Shawn, those weren’t part of it. Although, I’m not so sure as to why you did those things.”

Shawn shrugs, taking a bite of his burger before putting it back on the plate. “Maybe because I wanted to do them first. And I probably should’ve kissed you  _before_  you went out with him, or maybe I should’ve asked you to go out with me first. But I didn’t because I didn’t think you’d say yes. I also didn’t think you’d kiss me back the other night, or that you’d let me touch you like that.”

He probably shouldn’t have said all that, but he supposes he’s just throwing caution to the wind for now.

“I can’t stop thinking about it either.”

He’s shocked at your response, asks “ _What_?”

“That night, the night you and Gabe spied on our date, he kissed me after. Tried to keep going. But I stopped him, and he stopped when I asked.”

Shawn can feel his jaw clench, blood tainted green with jealousy. “He better have.”

“He did, but that’s not the point, Shawn.” You say, slightly annoyed.

“Then what is?”

“The point is that I stopped him because I couldn’t stop thinking about  _you_. About what we did in my room, what we almost did.”

Oh. “Oh,” Shawn says. “I uh, I’m sorry?”

“No you’re not.” You roll your eyes, and then suddenly you’re moving. You roll up onto your knees, swinging your leg over his hip until you’re straddling him, cupping his face in your hands and kissing him. Shawn feels the electricity between you two and his body ignites, your lips soft and supple against his, and on instinct his right hand tangles your hair, left hand resting on your ass and rolling your body forward, closing the distance as he shimmies down the cabana bed, laying back onto the pillows.

He can feel your hips roll down onto his body and he groans, hips bucking up and both his hands cupping your face, trying to keep you close, keep your lips on his. He feels like he’s dreaming, feels like this is a cruel trick that you’re kissing him first, that you want this. He doesn’t know that he deserves this, doesn’t know if he’s worthy of being with you like this, but he’ll be damned if he lets anyone else do it.

His hands wander from your face down to your hips, his fingers dipping under the fabric of your shirt and roaming up, the heat of your skin enticing as he moves to unclasp your bra, and his deft fingers are about to make quick work of them when you both hear the front door slam, Gabe calling out “I’m home!”

The both of you jump apart, you rolling off of him and Shawn rolling out from under you, grabbing the plate of two burgers and rushing into the house.

“Great, just made you a burger.” He says, hoping to put some distance between Gabe and you, so Gabe doesn’t suspect anything.

“Aw thanks Shawny!” Gabe says, taking the burger and a large appreciative bite, he turns, heading for the stairs and Shawn exhales with relief when he hears Gabe’s room door close. He goes back outside, nodding to you that Gabe is gone, before placing a knee on the cabana bed, kissing you once, twice, and three times before pulling away.

“Better go inside,” He whispers, pressing a kiss to your chin, cheek, and forehead - purposefully avoiding your lips. “It’s getting a little hot out here, don’t you think, honey?”


	4. Chapter 4

You step out of the shower, towel drying your hair as you walk into your room, clad in white lace cheeksters and an oversized worn shirt, sans bra, legs freshly shaven and lotioned up.

You feel like a million bucks and you’re only going to bed, but it makes you feel satisfied, and a little self care never hurt anyone.

Dinner with Shawn and Gabe was nice - both of them warning you that tomorrow night they’d be throwing a barbecue party of sorts and that Jacob and their friends Mat and Cody would be coming over - but they both teamed up and made a nice meal, and Gabe, now being twenty one, even bought you your own bottle of Moscato, which you drank half of at dinner, and you were looking forward to drinking the other half right…now.

Hanging your towel on the hook behind your door, you shut it, grabbing the bottle from your vanity and take a long sip, the strawberry taste soothing to your tongue as you collapse against your headboard, rubbing your legs together and appreciating the silkiness of your skin.

As the alcohol clouds your mind, all you can think about it Shawn.

You’re starting to open up to the idea of being with him - now that he’s older, muscular, more mature and not the annoying brace-face dweeb he was a few years ago - you’re starting to realize how much you’re undeniably attracted to him, and it makes you nervous.

You thought you’d feel guilty about kissing Shawn in the cabana only hours after you and Will called it quits, but you didn’t, just like how you didn’t feel guilty for kissing Shawn after you kissed Will in the driveway. You don’t feel guilty about any of it, in fact, you sort of want to kiss Shawn again, see maybe if his hands will work a little faster and undress you before you have to undress yourself.

You down the rest of the bottle, head feeling a little fuzzy but body feeling deliciously relaxed for once since the summer started, and you’re aware of the arousal pooling at your center. You lay back a little against your pillows, about to spread your legs open and pull your panties to the side when there’s a light knock on your room door, and you quickly scramble to hide under the covers before calling a soft “Come in.”

Your stomach does a little flip when Shawn slips through the little opening he makes before quietly closing your door and locking it behind him. He’s shirtless, clad in grey sweatpants, and when he turns to you, you see the wide smile across his face. When he sees you’re in bed, he gestures as if to say “can I join you?” Instead of responding, you scoot over and lift the blanket up for him to crawl under, which he does, climbing in and laying on his side to face you, and you mirror him.

“Hi.” He says, reaching up to brush hair out of your face. You giggle quietly, and when you do, Shawn can smell the alcohol, asks “Did you finish that bottle?”

“Maybe.” You whisper, “It was good.”

Shawn laughs. “Are you drunk?”

“Nope,” you say, popping the “P” and smiling at him. “But I wish I was, it might be fun.”

“Trust me honey, it’s not fun in the morning.”

“If we were both drunk would you touch me?”

Shawn shrinks back a little in shock. “What?”

“You don’t touch me enough.”

“I’m sorry honey, I just-”

“Do you not want me?”

Shawn shakes his head, scooting closer. “Of course I do! Are you crazy? I want to but…but I don’t know how you feel. I don’t know that you like me like that, and I like you. I like you a lot and I know this is weird but I want to prove it to you, but I also know that you might not like me back, so I don’t want to do something you don’t want to do.”

“I’m getting there.”

He blinks. “What?”

“You said I might not like you back. I’m telling you that I’m getting there, that I like you and that if you touch me again like that I won’t object.”

Shawn smiles. “Oh yeah? I’ll make sure you still feel that way in the morning. Now let me hold you so we can both get some sleep.”

You don’t object, turning around and pressing your back to his front, and Shawn holds you close, arms wrapped around your middle and burying his nose in your hair.

Shawn wakes in the morning to find you still asleep, resting your head on his chest, hair billowed around you and accentuating your beauty. He can see from the time on your bedside clock that it’s well past ten in the morning, and he needs to get out of your room before Gabe finds you both like this.

Shawn carefully peels himself out from under you and makes sure to adjust the covers, pressing a kiss to your forehead and then your cheek before slipping out of your room, closing the door quietly as to not wake you. When he turns toward the hall, he jumps in surprise, gasping embarrassingly loud when he sees Gabe standing there, brow raised in suspicion, arms crossed over his chest.

“Wanna tell me what you were doing inside my baby sister’s room?”

“Not particularly.” Shawn replies, sly smile on his face.

“I swear to  _fuck_  Mendes,” Gabe says, stepping closer and pointing a finger in Shawn’s face. “I love you like a brother but she is my  _sister_ and I will  _murder_  you if you hurt her.”

“Duly noted.” Shawn says, nodding like a cub scout.

Gabe still looks pissed, but says “go set up the grill and the backyard. I’m taking my sister grocery shopping so we can get shit for tonight, put a little room for Jesus between the two of you.”

He opens the door to your room, telling Shawn to am-scray, which he does, turning into his own room and shutting the door behind him. Gabe takes a seat on your bed, shaking your shoulder gently a few times to wake you up.

“Hey, get up dude, need your help today.” You stir after a few more shakes, looking at Gabe, then registering that it’s Gabe, heart leaping out of your chest and checking the space next to you for Shawn.

“If you’re looking for your cuddle buddy, he’s taking a shower in his room.” He teases. You groan, throwing your blanket over your head, and Gabe chuckles a little.

“Just fucking _don’t_ , Gabe.” You plead.

“Hey, look. I know I don’t usually get involved in your dating life because normally I don’t care, and I still don’t, just so we’re clear, but just be careful, okay? And if it means anything, I’m glad that if you’re interested in anyone, that it’s Shawn. Mostly because I live with him and I can watch him like a hawk, but that’s neither here nor there.”

You lower the blanket, peeking an eye out and raising a brow at him. “Are you being serious?”

Gabe laughs. “Yeah I am. Now are you going to get up and help me with the grocery shopping for the party or what?”

“Depends. Will you let me buy laxatives to put in Jacob’s stuff?”

Gabe rolls his eyes. “I will let you buy  _one_  small container and you can put one tablespoon of it in his drink.” He’s obviously joking, and he knows that you’re not, but his response is good enough, and you nod, getting up.

He leaves you to shower, brush your teeth, and change, and as you head down to meet Gabe in his car, you pass by Shawn’s room, where he’s standing shirtless and in black briefs. You make eye contact as you pass, your heart leaping out of your chest at the sight of him, and he winks at you, licking his lips for added effect and you nearly faint, bolting down the stairs before your body can carry you right into his room.

The little heated looks you and Shawn have been exchanging all night don’t go unnoticed.

Gabe tells you both to cool it, because it’s annoying. And you tell him to shut the fuck up and mind his own business, because  _he’s_ annoying, but you make a point not to outwardly acknowledge Shawn for the rest of the night.

You’re in mid conversation with Mat and Cody - of whom you realize are actually nice, like Gabe said they would be, and decide you don’t mind them being around - when you yawn, and Cody chuckles.

“I’m sorry, are we bothering you?” He jokes.

Mat laughs too. “Sorry we’re not all as interesting as Shawn.”

You roll your eyes. “Very funny, but I have no clue what you’re talking about. Now if you’ll excuse me, I think I’m gonna head to bed.” You hand Mat the rest of your red cup, turning into the house.

At your exit, Jacob makes a note that Shawn is watching you from his lawn chair, and he approaches Mat and Cody, pointing it out to them as well.

“What a joke.” Jacob says.

“I mean, it’s not a ‘joke,’ but it is a little creepy.” Cody says. “I don’t know that I’d be totally on board with my best friend and my little sister getting it on.”

“Who says they’re getting it on, idiot?” Mat says, rolling his eyes. “They just stared at each other all night. That’s not illegal.”

“But that’s  _Gabe’s sister_ -”

“‘The bane of your existence’ yes we fucking  _know_  Jacob.” Mat says, effectively cutting him off. Jacob chooses to ignore him, stalking over to Shawn and plopping himself down in the chair in front of him.

“You like her, don’t you.” He spits. It’s more of a statement than it is a question. “That’s why you defended her the other day. Why you’re looking out for her. Why you won’t stop staring at her. It’s because you like her.”

“And if I do?” Shawn challenges.

“Then I’d say you’re an idiot.”

Shawn shrugs, figures lying to him will be easier. He’s getting tired of putting up with Jacob’s horrendous attitude. “Look dude,” he starts, making sure that Gabe, Mat, and Cody can’t hear him when he says “Just because she got hot or whatever doesn’t mean I want to date her.”

“Perfect. Then you won’t be afraid to make a little wager.”

Shawn narrows his eyes. “What kind of wager?” He’s definitely fucking sick of him, but dammit if he won’t put Jacob in his fucking place.

“I bet you $500 that you won’t ask her out. I bet even if she does go on a date with you, that it won’t be more than that. You probably wouldn’t even last a month with her.”

Little does Jacob know that Shawn’s technically halfway there. And if this bet speeds up the process, earns Shawn some money, and gets Jacob to shut his fucking trap, then hell yeah, he’s gonna do it. “Deal.” Shawn says. “Fucking watch me.” He stands up, full of confidence, and heads into the house, heading straight for your room.

You’re sitting at your vanity, freshly showered and lotioned in your white fluffy robe, towel twisted high on your head as you apply your nightly moisturizer, and you’re trying not to think about what Gabe, Mat, and Cody said, but it’s no use. You can’t help but realize that you were definitely staring at Shawn all night, and you start to wonder if your interest in him is really that obvious.

Truth be told, you didn’t think you would ever see Shawn in this way, never thought that you would be so caught up on his touch, his kiss, the way his body made yours feel, and you definitely did not anticipate how badly you wished that he would just cut the crap and take you to bed and make you see stars.

This is your older brother’s best friend, the boy you grew up with, the boy you’d been around for years, and there is definitely a line that you shouldn’t cross, but it’s too late. After all this time, it has to be  _this_  summer that your eyes are open, like you’re seeing him for the first time.

You think back to spring break, where you went to visit him and Gabe while they were studying abroad in Europe, and you don’t remember ever noticing Shawn the way that you’re noticing him now. You definitely remember looking at him when you landed in London and thinking “he’s definitely grown up,” but you don’t think you picked up on anything else until Annie pointed it out to you.

Damn her.

You definitely don’t need to get under Shawn to get over Will, because there’s nothing really to get over. It’s obvious to you now that you and Will were never actually a real possibility, and while you were sad about it at first, Shawn’s been doing a hell of a good job at distracting you and making you feel a lot better.

You liked the way he held you last night while you slept, and you definitely can’t deny that you enjoy it when he’s so close to you that you can swear he can hear your heart beating. But what does that even mean? What does that make the two of you?

The answer comes with Shawn barreling through your bedroom door, eyes determined like a man on a mission as he crosses over to you in three strides, scooping you up and out of you chair, and into his arms for a breathtaking kiss. One arm snakes inside your robe, wrapping around your bare middle and pulling you against his body, and the other arm wraps around your back, carefully undoing your towel and carding his fingers through your wet hair.

When you two finally part after a moment, your eyes immediately go to his slightly swollen pink lips that are smiling at you, and your chest is rising and falling, trying to catch your breath.

“I’ve been wanting to do that all day.” He says. “That, and I have a question to ask you.”

 _Dear god this is it._  “Which is?”

“Do you like Italian food?”

“I believe so.”

“And you like me, right?”

“I do.”  _Sweet baby Jesus yes I do._

“And you’re out of work tomorrow at five?”

“I am.”

“Perfect,” he says, kissing you again. “Then tomorrow night at seven I’m taking you out to dinner and then we’re going to the fair. Deal?”

You nod excitedly, can’t contain your smile or the blush creeping up your face. “Deal.”

“And then maybe after that, say like, the next day, when you’re off work maybe I can take you out for ice cream?”

“Okay.”

“And then tomorrow, when we’re out, I’ll hold your hand, kiss you, maybe say that you’re my girl? Would that be alright?”

“God yes,” you breathe out, cupping his face in your hands and pulling him back down to kiss you, both his hands fitting inside your robe, gently squeezing your bare ribs as he pulls you closer, lips soft and gentle against yours, tongue licking into your mouth excitedly every now and again.

You start to walk you both back to your bed, the heat between your legs not something you can ignore anymore, but Shawn stays firm in his place, gently pulling away by planting smaller kisses on your lips, neck, shoulder, and back.

“Not yet baby,” he says. “We’ve got all the time in the world for that, okay? Just not right now.”

You frown, trying to pull him back to you, but he just laughs, pulling away and re-tying your robe, handing your towel back to you. He kisses you on the lips once, twice, and a third time for good measure, before he says “Okay, get some rest. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

The smile on your face is sure to be etched into his memory as he walks away, and he shuts the door behind him, heading back downstairs.

When he finds Jacob, he claps a hand on his shoulder and says “you owe me $500, asshole.”


	5. Chapter 5

You’ve been antsy all day at work, anticipating your date with Shawn and bouncing off the walls, your excitement causing you to be extremely polite to customers, a few of them eyeing you and questioning your behavior.

Willy approaches you right after you clock out and head for the cubbies, resting a hand on your back when he says “You alright there, babe? Been hyper all day.”

He’s taken to calling you “babe” lately, and instead of it being something that rubs salt in the wound, it calms you, and you secretly love it. “I’m fine,” you say. “Just excited.”

“Got a hot date?” He teases. But when he sees the look on your face, you answer his question, and at first you’re worried about his reaction, but then he hugs you tight, pulling you into his chest. 

“Oh my god you do!” He exclaims, squeezing you. 

“Willy?”

“You’re going on a date!” He pulls back, holds you at arm’s length. “Who is it?”

“Shawn,” you say, and Will nods, smiles a little bit.

“I thought so. It makes sense - why he reacted to me the way he did.  _He_  wanted you, and now he got you.” Will’s voice trails off at the end, and he smirks, giggling to himself.

“What?” You ask.

Will shakes his head. “It’s nothing…well, I mean it kind of is. Because without me you two never would have ended up together, so you’re welcome. I’m your matchmaker.”

You laugh at him. “Sure Will, you’re the matchmaker.” You grab your backpack, slinging it over your shoulder and giving Will a hug goodbye before getting in your Jeep and heading home.

Neither Shawn nor Gabe’s car is in the driveway when you get there, and you’re thankful. You head upstairs to shower, taking your time to get ready.

You don’t know how fancy dinner is going to be, but you are going to the fair after, so it can’t be too fancy, right? You settle on a pair of blue high waisted shorts and a white tank top to best deal with the heat of the summer afternoon, pairing it with your favorite necklace, throwing your hair up into its signature messy bun once it’s dry.

You figure you’ll just wait in your room until Shawn lets you know it’s time to go, so you take a seat at your desk, opening up your laptop and FaceTiming Morgan.

“What are you doing?” She asks. “Shouldn’t you be getting ready for your date?”

“I am ready,” You say, rolling your eyes. You stand up and spin to show your outfit and she hums appreciatively.

“He won’t be able to keep his eyes or his hands off of you.”

“I sure fucking hope so.” You murmur. “Do you think I should wear a bra, or no?”

“Why  _wouldn’t_ you wear a bra?”

“Because he doesn’t know my nipples are pierced and I would like him to know.”

Morgan cackles. “You fucking weirdo. Just wear a bralette or something then, something lacy and strappy but that doesn’t catch on the bars.”

You nod, knowing just the baby pink bralette. “Smart, smart.”

“Are you gonna get laid?” She asks as you step out of frame to put said bralette on, shrugging to yourself and saying “why the fuck not” when you take of your shorts and go commando, tossing your underwear in the hamper and zipping your shorts backup, stepping in frame.

You snort. “Again, I sure fucking hope so. Gabe won’t be home tonight so if Shawn doesn’t get the hint I might go nuts.”

Morgan rolls her eyes. “Maybe Willy should’ve slept with you sooner. How long has it been since you’ve been laid?”

“Literally since March.”

“Brady?!” She screeches, reminding you of your ex boyfriend, still a friend of Jimmy’s. “You haven’t had sex since  _Brady_?!”

“Announce it to the whole fucking world why don’t you.” You hiss. “Yes, it’s been since March, and now it’s the end of May. What’s your point?”

“That Willy  _definitely_  should have slept with you at prom. No wonder you’re such a horn ball.”

“For your information, we broke up before I left to go visit Gabe on spring break. And I wasn’t interested in having sex with Willy until school was almost over.”

“That was literally almost a month ago now, you have no excuse.” You have a smart ass response on the tip of your tongue when you hear a car door slam outside, signaling that Shawn must be home, and you squeal in delight. Morgan rolls her eyes. “I take it he’s back?”

“Yep! I’ll text you after!”

Morgan smiles and shakes her head at your eagerness, but waves her fingers a little before ending the call.

You hear keys before the door opens, and Shawn calls “You home baby?”

You come out of your room, leaning on the railing and meeting his eyes instantly when you look down. He’s wearing black basketball shorts and a black tank top that clings to his torso, nipples poking out at the AC in the house.

He’s smiling at you when he says “You ready to be romanced?”

A giggle leaves your lips. “I believe so.”

He waits by the bottom of the stairs while you grab your phone, wristlet, and keys, and when you reach him he wraps an arm around your waist, bending down to press a tender kiss to your lips.

“One for now,” he murmurs, then kisses you again. “And one for the road.”

“There’s more where that came from.” You tell him, pressing your body flush against his while you steal another kiss for yourself.

-

You’ve got a bag of cotton candy in one hand as you tow Shawn behind you with the other, heading right for the Ferris Wheel. After a light dinner at The Spaghetti Factory, you arrived at the fair right as the sun began to set. Shawn insisted on paying for everything, which was nice at first, but you insisted that he at least let you pay for your own cotton candy.

After riding all of the rollercoasters, the swings, and trying your hand at the rock climbing wall and fun house, the only ride that remains is the Ferris Wheel.

Shawn was apprehensive at first, something about not wanting to go on it because he was afraid it wasn’t sturdy enough, but you encouraged him, promising him that if he went on, you’d give him a kiss at the top.

And, okay, when you put it that way, then sure, he’d love to go on it with you.

You’re bouncing with a mix of sugar and excitement while waiting in line, and he can’t help but smile as he watches you, rubbing your back or just resting his hand on your shoulder, pulling you to his side and rubbing your arms. It’s definitely cooled down since you’ve been outside, and Shawn takes full advantage, keeping his body close to yours to keep you warm.

When you finally are allowed on, Shawn immediately laces his hands with yours as you take a seat, and when the ride kicks in, he takes a sharp inhale, and you raise a brow at him.

“You okay there?”

He shakes his head, smiling nervously at you. “I don’t like heights.”

Your eyes widen. “What? Why didn’t you say something other than ‘it doesn’t look sturdy enough’?”

Shawn laughs but it’s strained. “Didn’t wanna ruin your fun.” You can feel him starting to breathe heavier, and he squeezes your hand, chuckles weakly and says “I’m sorry, I didn’t think I’d be  _this_ scared.” The ride only climbs higher, moving a little faster and you can see the panic in his eyes. “Can you - I need you to distract me, can you-”

You immediately climb onto his lap, straddling his waist and pressing your hips down into his, anchoring him to the seat while you capture his lips in a fast and scandalous kiss. You take his hands and put them on your ass, encouraging him to stick his hands in your back pockets, squeezing your covered cheeks. You cup his face in your hands, fingers brushing over the stubble while your lips move against his, chests flush, and you can feel his growing arousal beneath you and it makes you  _want_.

Beneath the both of you, the ride comes to a halt, and you slowly pull away, watching Shawn as his eyes slowly open. They’re hazy, glazed over and he looks like he’s somewhere else until he gives a lazy smile. He grabs your ass hard, biting his lip as the wind blows against your skin, and it’s then that you look out and see your cart is at the top of the Ferris Wheel. You can see the beautiful lights of the city, and the air is warm but the breeze makes it a lot cooler, and the sky is a beautiful shade of navy, stars just starting to peek out.

“Wow.” You breathe out, fingers still soft against Shawn’s face.

“You’re so fucking beautiful.”

Your head whips back to him and you blush, looking down. He ducks his head down to try to meet your eyes, ends up taking his right hand from your shorts and uses his index finger to make you look at him. His eyes are so sincere, and you suddenly feel too open, too exposed.

Shawn can see it in your eyes, and he shakes his head. “No no no.” He murmurs, pulling you by the chin to kiss him again. This time, he wraps his arms around your middle, bringing your chests back together. Only this time, when his chest surges up, he pushes against the fabric of your tank top and bralette, brushing against the bars in your nipples and it makes you gasp out, moaning against his mouth and you feel him stutter beneath you.

He pulls away, looks at you with surprise in his eyes. “Are you… _do you have your nipples pierced_?” He asks, almost breathless.

You nod. “I’d show them to you, but we’re in public.”

“If I get us out of the public will you show them to me?”

You giggle, taking the opportunity to climb off of his lap as the ride starts to move again. You sit across from him this time, putting some distance between the two of you. “If you get me out of here fast enough, then maybe.”

Shawn raises a suspicious brow, frowning a little at the fact that you’re so far away from him. “Can I look  _and_  touch?”

“Depends.”

“On?”

You want to take a deep breath in before you speak, but you know that if you do, it’ll be shaky. So you go for the vote of confidence within yourself, cross your legs and smile sweetly when you say “If you can be a good boy.”

His eyes darken at your words, beautiful pink bottom lip going back between his teeth. His hands are at his sides, and you can tell what you’ve just said is having an effect on him, and you just might get laid tonight.

Once the ride stops, Shawn takes your hand and leads you out of the line, heading right out of the fair and to the car. The drive home is quiet, and Gabe’s car is nowhere to be seen. You remember that he’s at Jacob’s the whole night, which makes you smile and allows you to waltz into the house in front of Shawn, exaggerating the swing of your hips just a little bit as you ascend the stairs to your room.

Shawn follows quietly behind you into your room, shutting the door behind you both and watching you as your back remains to him, you stripping your tank top over your head, and he follows suit before watching you remove your bralette, and he nearly drops to his knees when you remove your shorts to reveal the bare skin beneath it.

You finally turn to face him, his expression clearly reading shock, face flushed red. You saunter over, trying not to over do anything. When you reach him, you take his hands and place them on your hips, saying “You can touch now.”

You’re quite shocked at how cool and calm and confident you’re being, having only done this a handful of times before with your ex boyfriend between your birthday in January and your break up in March. But something about Shawn brings it all out of you, makes it easy to express yourself sexually in a way that makes you feel like Superwoman.

His hands are warm and shaking a bit when they land on your skin. It takes him a few seconds, but then his hands are under your thighs and lifting you up, wrapping your legs around him as he walks you back to your bed, laying you on it gently.

“I wanted to do this the night you came back from the beach.” He says, voice strained as his hands cup your breasts, thumb rubbing over your nipples and the bars. “I was so angry that you let that kid kiss you, that you let him touch your thigh. I wanted you all to myself, and I was ready to prove it to you, but you weren’t ready, so I stopped.” Shawn lowers his head, tongue flicking out to taste your skin at the valley between your breasts. “I need you to tell me if I’m moving too fast, baby.” He says. “I need you to tell me if you want me to stop.”

“I don’t.” You tell him, and he takes that as his cue. His mouth sucks your right breast into his mouth, his large hands palming the other before he switches, hips canting up into yours as he continues to palm your breasts, lips moving to your neck where he nips a little, sucking the skin hard into his mouth while his tongue soothes over the area.

It’s all so much - the sensitivity of your boobs, his hands, his mouth, and his hips, and you’re moaning like crazy already. There’s a sense of desperation and urgency in his touch, and you tangle your fingers in his hair and tug, making him release your neck to look at you.

“Do you want me to stop?” He asks, concerned, his hands already moving off of your body.

You shake your head. “No, but…just slow down, yeah? We have all night. We have all summer. I’m not going anywhere.” You say.

At that he smiles, nodding to capture your lips again. He pulls back after another moment and there’s a question in his eyes.

“What is it Shawn?”

He exhales through his nose. “Can I…since we’re going slow, can I just take tonight to make you feel good? Please?”

You feel a pang of emotion in your heart and you want to cry. Maybe he took the “good boy” thing to heart, and you want to expand on that but you don’t have the time. You’re too keyed up and desperate for release, so you nod eagerly, kissing him properly one time before he squares his shoulders a bit, taking a deep breath as he takes the chance to kiss you again for good measure before he sucks a bruise in the plane between your breast, a pleasant gasp leaving your mouth and becoming music to his ears. His tongue flicks out to taste your nipples, palming them as he scoots down the bed, kissing the tender spots of your thighs inches below your dripping wet center, making you jump and giggle in delight.

Shawn can smell you, and it’s driving him insane, got him grinding down into your mattress to ease his own hard on. It’s like the scent alone sends him on a high, and his tongue immediately pops out, starting at your entrance and licking up before sucking around your clit and moaning at the taste of your on his tongue. His moan sends vibrations through your body and your hips instinctively buck upwards. You let out a whine before a cry of pleasure when he does it again, and his buck down in response. Shawn uses his arms and hooks them under your thighs, pulling you toward his mouth, intertwining his hands and securing your hips to the bed.

If he’s going to taste you, he’s going to take his time.

He could also come just like this - licking at you and grinding against your bed. Doesn’t want to push you to do something you don’t want to. As much as he wants to be inside of you, he’s willing to wait if it means he can enjoy pleasing you, watching the way you take everything he has to give.

He takes another long lick up and then down before focusing on your clit, sucking it into his mouth and rubbing it gently with his tongue. He can feel you dripping on his chin, releases you a minute to lick again, tasting you, getting more, before returning to your sensitive bud. He sticks his tongue out, your clit sitting atop it nicely, and he _sucks_ like that, his tongue adding pressure and rubbing up against you deliciously, the friction driving you insane.

It’s when you feel his finger at your entrance, dipping into you that you begin to lose it. You’ve been on edge since the Ferris Wheel and when his finger slides in all the way, another one joining seconds later, that he feels you clench down on his fingers your upper body lifting off of the bed, head thrown back and eyes shut tight. The cry that leaves your body has Shawn whimpering as he laps at you, drinking in all you have to offer.

Your body is still shaking when you suddenly feel Shawn stand after a few moments, and when you manage to lift your head up to look at him, you can see how hard he is, straining against his shorts.

You make grabby hands at him, and he carefully climbs on top of you, bracing himself on one forearm, using his free hand to brush the stray hair out of your face so he can plant a kiss on your lips. You snake one hand between your bodies, dipping below the waistband of his shorts and wrapping your hand around his hard cock, gasping out, and then groaning when you swipe your thumb over the head and feeling how he’s already leaking.

He shakes his head as if to say “you don’t have to,” but you’re already moving, turning him onto his back, moving down the bed and helping him shimmy out of his shorts and briefs. You settle between his thighs, wrapping your hand back around him and pumping a few times before you take the tip of him into your mouth, suckling a little before taking him down. Shawn cries out, eyes squeezing shut when you hollow out your cheeks on the way up, following it up with pumping his cock with your hand.

His hands fly to your hair, carefully avoiding your bun as you both look at each other. His eyes look frantic, and he manages to say “I’m sorry, I dont - I don’t think I’ll last much longer. You feel so good.”

You nod, smirking to yourself and continue your motions, speeding up and tightening your grip, and then his hips lift off the bed, hands gripping at the sheets as a deep groan leaves his chest, breathing frantic as he comes in ribbons down your throat. You happily accept it, making eye contact with him when you swallow and his hips stutter on instinct.

Suddenly he’s sitting up, hands wrapping under your arms and pulling you up the bed to cuddle with him, skin to skin as he brings the blanket over the both of you. He kisses you appreciatively, hands finding yours under the blanket when he whispers to you how beautiful you are, how lucky he is for this moment.

-

It’s about a week later when he takes you on another date. He insists because he wants to do it properly, wants to be able to wine and dine you and not jump your bones the minute you get home. He brings you mini-golfing, doesn’t judge you when you can’t swing the club just right, takes the opportunity to help you with the putter while keeping a safe distance between you both.

The next day after that is three days later, and it’s spontaneous, he picks you up when you get out of work and brings you to the park for a picnic and Friday night fireworks. It gets rained out on, so Shawn promises you’ll re-do the picnic date later on when it’s not terrible, but he does kiss you in the rain on the doorstep to the house, helps you dry off and makes hot cocoa for you both while you sit on the couch for a movie instead.

He stops at nothing to prove that he has feelings for you, forgetting the bet and $500 sitting in his sock drawer completely because he’s so wrapped up in you - being around you, spoiling you, kissing you, enjoying your company - that he just wants to prove he can be your boyfriend.

And you love his company too. You’ve definitely developed deeper feelings for him, and it’s obvious. You both open up to each other, learning about one another.

About a month after loving dates, going out, staying in, late night confessions, kisses, and a few sexy nights in, Shawn prepares a candlelit dinner at home, buys you roses, and asks you to be his girlfriend.

And you agree, because why wouldn’t you?

You though this summer was going to suck, but now? Now that you have Shawn with you, and he loves you, and you love him, it was turning out to be the beautiful summer you were hoping to have all along.


	6. Chapter 6

Jacob nearly throws his phone across the room when he sees a picture of you and Shawn on his Instagram. It’s a comparison photo, side by side. The one on the left is from earlier in the summer, both of you in an awkward side hug, and on the right, he’s dressed in a nice button up, sleeves up to his elbows and khakis, and you’re in a summer dress, roses in your hand. The photo is captioned _“#transformationtuesday, from our first date exactly one month ago, to tonight, when I asked her to be mine, and she said yes. thank you for giving me the chance to be yours”_

He wants to vomit at how disgusted he feels.

According to Gabe, you and Shawn have been going on dates almost every day since your first date a month ago - hiking, swimming at the pool, the beach, the lake, going to the movies, ice cream, dinners, to the boardwalk, mini golfing, soccer at the park - and all this meant to Jacob was that he was $500 in the hole.

He’s pissed as fuck, starts to type out a text to Shawn but thinks better of it. He knows that he’s upset because he lost the bet but also, he realizes that Shawn actually fucking likes you and that’s just…that’s just not allowed.

You’ve always been the annoying baby sister, not to mention that you’re  _Gabe’s_ baby sister, and oh god.

How could  _Gabe_  be okay with this?

Gabe’s seen Shawn in action at school, pulling women left and right, bringing girls home and immediately forgetting their names the morning after. And not that Jacob cares about you, because he doesn’t, but knowing how Shawn is, how could Gabe as an older brother possibly think it’s okay for the two of you to be together?

What the fuck changed after a year in Europe?

Overall though, and the most important thing, is that he’s furious that Shawn would even consider dating you, that Gabe would let this happen, because you  _ruined_  his life.

And he’ll never stop hating your for it.

-

It’s a hot summer morning about a week after you agreed to be Shawn’s girlfriend, and all the boys are over at your house for an impromptu pool party. You’re fine with it, don’t mind having the guys over because you know that later this afternoon, you and Shawn are going on a picnic date, so what’s a few hours of enduring testosterone?

You weren’t going to take it easy on Shawn though. You’re wearing a navy blue strapless top, and matching bottoms with ties on the side, and Shawn cannot take his eyes off you. He’d do something about it too, if the others weren’t here, and if Jacob wasn’t being such a dick.

When they all got here about two hours ago, Shawn and Jacob engaged in a heated exchange upstairs in his room, and when they rejoined everyone, Jacob had been nothing but extremely rude to you, but you opted to be the bigger person and not fight back.

You know he’s probably angry at the news that you and Shawn are dating, given the snippets of yelling you heard, but you’re not going to give Jacob the time of day. Shawn and Gabe have defend you for the most part, and Mat and Cody have stepped in occasionally to make sure Jacob wasn’t going too far, but overall, it wasn’t a fun time.

You’re laying out on the cabana bed, overhead shade pulled up when you hear a throat clear from beside you, pulling you away from the book you’d been reading.

Mathew approaches, taking the lawn chair next to you. He hands you a bottle of lemonade from the cooler, leaning back before looking at you with a questioning face. “Hey, so, I’ve only been friends with these guys for a few years, but can you let me in on the joke?”

You stare at Mathew. “What joke?”

“The whole ‘golden snitch’ thing. I mean, it’s obviously a joke to Jacob and not to you but…what happened?”

You sigh loudly, kicking at the grass under your shoe. “I didn’t know he still called me that.”

Mat winces. “Sorry, I guess it’s a behind your back thing.”

“It’s kind of a long story.” You warn him.

“That’s fine, I’ve got time.” He says, nodding to the pool where Gabe, Shawn, Jacob, and Cody are playing Chicken.

“It’s why Jacob hates me so much,” You start. “The whole ‘golden snitch’ thing, it’s why he’s always been so mean to me. When I was thirteen, Gabe, Jacob, and Shawn had all just turned sixteen, and that was also the summer that Shawn had to stay with us while his family went to London. My parents have always adored Shawn, so they trusted him and Gabe to both be responsible enough to watch me and take care of the house whenever they went out.”

“One of the times they went out during the summer, they were gonna be gone overnight, and so Gabe and Shawn invited Jacob over to play video games and eat pizza. We were all on the couches in the living room and Jacob got up to use the bathroom, but then he disappeared for like fifteen minutes.”

“When he came back, he had a bottle of red wine from our parents’ alcohol stash from the basement. He basically went into my parent’s room, dug through their drawers and through their closet and found the code to their locked alcohol cabinet in the basement, and stole a bottle. He tried to convince Gabe and Shawn to drink it with him, but Gabe and Shawn weren’t into that kind of thing. Gabe just wanted him to put it back, but Jacob refused. Shawn tried to talk Jacob out of it too, but it didn’t work. So Gabe tried to take the bottle from him, and they fought over it and somehow the bottle broke, and red wine got all over the white carpet.”

“Oh shit.” Mathew gasped slightly, looking to the boys in the pool in slight disbelief before looking back to you.

“Gabe knew it was going to get kinda ugly, so he told me to go upstairs to my room and stay there while he and Shawn tried to clean up. They yelled at each other for awhile, and then Gabe stormed into his room, and Jacob left. I went back downstairs and Shawn and I tried to clean up the mess, but it didn’t work. We freaked out because my parents were going to be home the next morning, but there was nothing we could do.”

“So when my parents got home, they saw the stain and they freaked out. I waited for Shawn and Gabe to tell them the truth, but instead Gabe took the blame. He said he wanted to try it, so he raided their room and found the code and took the bottle. My parents were really strict on us, but they also gave us a lot of freedom, so Gabe and I both knew that this was going to be the thing that was going to ground him for life, and since Shawn was living with us, my parents were probably going to punish him too, or call his parents and tell them and then they’d punish him, so I didn’t know why Gabe was taking the blame for Jacob, or why Shawn was letting him do it. So I got upset, and I told my parents the truth. Like, the whole truth.”

Mathew nods, realization dawning on his face. “You snitched.”

“Yep,” you say. “Then my mom called Jacob’s mom and told her what happened, and he got grounded for the entire summer, and Gabe and Shawn got mad at me for it.”

Mathew nearly spits out the sip of his drink he just took. “Wait. Gabe and Shawn were mad at you because you saved their asses?”

“Well, I mean, I did, but I also took their friend away. I didn’t know Jacob’s dad was an alcoholic, and that his mother kept comparing him to his father, and that whole wine thing kind of hit the nail on the head. Not to mention, after that summer, Jacob’s mom sent him off to boarding school in New England, so not only did I insult Jacob, but I took him away from Gabe and Shawn.”

“Wow.” Mathew says, shaking his head.

“Yeah. That’s why Jacob has called me the ‘golden snitch’ ever since - despite forgiving Gabe and Shawn he would never forgive me. He hates me, but he deals with me because Gabe is still his best friend, and because Shawn is still nice to me.”

“I’m sorry,” Mathew says. “Jacob’s an asshole.”

“Why do you all apologize for him?” You ask, frustrated. “Do you even realize that? You all make excuses for him and defend him. It was cuter when he was younger, but he’s not a kid anymore. He’s an adult. He should own up to his own mistakes.”

Mathew sighed. “You’re right. He’s just not there yet as a person I guess.”

You shrug, keeping quiet.

“He’s my roommate and all, and I know he can be an asshole, but I didn’t know he was a bully.” Mathew says softly.

You shrug your shoulders again. “I’m not saying I disagree. I’ve just gotten to the point where I don’t care anymore. He’s not worth my time or my energy.”

Mathew chuckles. “That’s really mature of you.”

You smile a little at that, and he holds his soda bottle out to you to toast, and you do. “And if it means anything,” Mathew says. “I think you’re a pretty cool person. And Shawn likes you a lot, and he’s like my little brother, so I’m in your corner.”

You laugh a little at that, feeling better. “Thank you.”

-

After another hour or so of swimming and laying out on the cabana bed, you head upstairs to take a nap before your picnic date with Shawn later that afternoon.

Downstairs, Jacob is bitching up a storm about nothing in particular, and Mat and Cody groan in annoyance.

“Dude, shut the fuck up.” Cody says.

Jacob frowns. “What?”

“You’ve been an asshat all day and dude, as much as I love you, I’m about two seconds away from hitting you.” Mat says.

“Seriously.” Cody agrees. “You’ve been mean to Gabe’s little sister all fucking day. What’s your issue?”

“I hate her.” Jacob says simply.

Mat rolls his eyes. “She told me about it, you know.” At that, Jacob is silent. “I won’t say shit about it, but you need to be nicer to her. Shawn really likes her and we think she’s cool, and it just makes you look like an asshole when you’re being mean to her when everyone else likes her, and especially because Shawn is like…in love with her.”

“Shawn’s  _in love_  with her?” Jacob asks, incredulous, like he’s almost offended at the news. He knew Shawn liked her, but  _love_?

“Yes you idiot.” Cody says, shaking his head. “Are you blind? They’re in love.”

Jacob’s mind is whirling. They’re in love? That’s  _not_  what the bet was about.  _What’s going on?_

-

You wake up to your alarm later that afternoon, feeling rested, muscles stretching deliciously as you head to the shower, brushing your teeth and refreshing yourself.

Once you’re done, you dry off and lotion up, dealing with the task of brushing your long hair and opting to leave it down. You put on a lacy baby pink thong, a yellow spaghetti strap sundress, forgoing the bra, and go with your white high top converse, figuring casual and cute never hurt anyone.

You can hear Shawn getting ready in his room as you pass it and head down to the kitchen to grab the stuff you made earlier to put in the cooler.

When you enter the kitchen, Jacob is in there alone. “Oh, hey.” He says when you come in. He sounds…almost happy to see you, and you don’t know why. It’s a stark contrast from his behavior earlier today.

“Hi?” You offer.

“Whatcha up to?”

You raise a brow at him, wondering why he’s being like this. “Grabbing stuff. Shawn and I are going on a picnic date.”

Jacob smiles. “That sounds fun.” He pauses. “You know, I never thought that you and Shawn would be a thing. Mat says you guys are in love.”

You flush deep, can feel the heat in your cheeks and your neck. “Maybe we are.” You grab the cooler from near the patio door, putting ice packs in it before you start to pack the food and drinks.

“That’s…oddly cute.” He says. “In a way I didn’t expect.”

“What were you expecting?” You ask, suspicious.

“Oh, nothing.” He says, standing then. “I just didn’t expect you two to end up together, you know? I’d bet money that Shawn didn’t expect it either.”

“Yeah,” you offer. “It was kind of fast.”

“I’ll bet.” He says. Jacob stands suddenly, stretching. “Well, I should get going. Have fun on your date.”

As he starts to leave, Shawn enters the kitchen. They exchange a heated look, Shawn’s jaw clenching, but then Jacob leaves, and Shawn is at your side, rubbing your arms. “What did he say to you?”

You shake your head, admiring his simply outfit of khaki shorts and a simple white shirt. You run your hands over his chest when you say “Nothing, he just…made small talk? I guess. He wasn’t mean though.”

“Good.” Shawn says, kissing your forehead. “Just making sure he’s not being mean to my girl again. Are you ready to go?”

You nod, and Shawn takes the cooler from you, holding it with one hand while taking your hand with the other, leading you out to his car.

There’s a weird feeling in your stomach at the encounter you just had with Jacob, and you’re not sure what’s going on, but you know it’s definitely not normal.


	7. Chapter 7

It’s two weeks later when Jacob is at your house again, and he’s here with a purpose.

He heads upstairs and storms into Shawn’s room, finding him on the bed as he’s putting on socks and says “You’d better tell her the truth before I do.”

At that, Shawn rises to his full height, reminding Jacob that he is taller, stronger, and more than capable of taking him on in a fight if necessary. “Excuse me?”

Jacob doesn’t falter, steps right into Shawn’s face. “You heard me, Mendes. This bet wasn’t made so you could date her and fall in love and get married and raise children and goldfish together. I thought you just wanted to fuck her and leave, not pull this shit.”

“Why does it matter to you Jacob? It’s not like you want in her pants either.”

“It matters to me because she ruined my fucking life and  _you_  are my best friend. Gabe is her brother, I get that, but you? You never had any ties to her. You were supposed to be on  _my_  side, not hers.”

Shawn scoffs. “This isn’t high school anymore, Jacob. This is real life. And if I want to be with her, then no one is going to stop me.”

“Except me.” Jacob reminds, voice going low and threatening. “Does she know the only reason that you’re her boyfriend right now is because I made a bet with you? Because that bet dared you to ask her out? Does she know her entire relationship is a lie? That all she’s worth is five hundred dollars to you? Because in my mind she’s worth a lot less.”

Shawn wants to pummel his face in to the point where it’s so unrecognizable God wouldn’t know what to do with him. But instead, he strides over to his drawers, pulling the top one out and retrieving the five hundred dollars in question, before turning around and jabbing it into Jacob’s chest.  

“If all of this is about you losing your money,” Shawn says, voice calm, “Then here. Take it and keep it. It’s worthless to me. She is worth more to me than all of the money on this earth, and she means a lot more to me than our friendship does.”

When he says this, he can see something flash in Jacob’s eyes. Jacob is quiet for a minute, before his face pulls into a twisted smile, and he laughs, nodding and patting Shawn on the shoulder. “Yeah, alright then. Good to know.” He starts to leave, Shawn sort of surprised that he’s not putting up a fight, and before he shuts the door, Jacob says “See you at the bonfire tonight, Mendes.”

-

You’re walking up the driveway, humming a little to yourself when you look up and see Jacob leaving. He’s got his signature scowl on his face, but when he sees you, he smiles at you and waves. “Hey! Did you just get out of work? How was it?”

His newfound friendliness is starting to creep you out, makes your stomach churn, but you promised Gabe to try to be nice, so you say “Yeah, I did. It wasn’t too bad. Are you leaving?”

Jacob nods. “I am, gotta go back to my place. Mat and Cody are helping me get stuff for the bonfire tonight.”

“Oh yeah,” you say, laughing slightly. “I forgot that was tonight. Do you need us to pick up anything? I mean…anything that’s not already here?”

He shakes his head, smiling. “No don’t worry about it, I’ve got it covered. But hey! Why don’t you invite some of your friends over? There’s gonna be plenty of food and drinks and stuff for people.”

You blink, shocked at his offer. “Really? But I thought you said my friends were lame?” You’re half teasing, but also half double checking he’s not being an asshole and kidding around.

“I was just giving you a hard time about that.” He says. “But really, invite them! It’s your house, so why not invite your friends? That way everyone is around.”

Something in your gut makes your heart pound heavy in your chest, and it’s the same feeling you had the first time Jacob was nice to you, but you don’t know what it is, so you ignore it, tell Jacob “Yeah, okay, sure.”

He’s smiling again. “Awesome! Well, I’d better get going. Losing daylight, y’know? I’ll see you tonight!” He says, and waves one more time before getting into his car and driving away.

You send a quick text to your group chat, inviting everyone over for tonight and waiting for their confirmations that they’re coming, and then head inside, shutting the front door behind you.

“I’m home!” You call out, heading up the stairs. Shawn comes out of his room then, meeting you at the top and pulling you into a breathless kiss. The urgency in it has you pulling back a little, laughing when you ask him “what’s wrong?”

He shakes his head. “Stupid Jacob, pissing me off.”

The little polite encounter you just had flashes in your head, “What happened?”

“Nothing. I’m just happy you’re home.” He says, fingers fitting themselves on your waist. He squeezes once, then says “And Gabe isn’t home…”

You raise a brow. “Oh?”

Shawn nods, biting his lip as his eyes scan over your body. “And you just got home from work. So how about we take a nice bubble bath? I can help you de-stress from your tough day.”

You giggle. “Scooping ice cream isn’t that tough.”

“Shhh,” he tells you, kissing you. “Let me be romantic. Let me get you out of these clothes.” His fingers are already at the hem of your shirt, pulling it over your head before admiring your bra from aerie and ridding you of that too, tugging you into your room.

He pushes you gently, laying you back on the bed and drops to his knees. His arms wrap around your thighs, pulling you to the edge of your bed, his long fingers making quick work of your shorts button and zipper, yanking them down your legs and tossing them to the side.

Shawn hums appreciatively at the sight of your black lacy underwear, noses at your covered mound and you throw your head back, moan leaving your lips as he pulls your underwear down, spreading your legs and dipping his finger in, testing your wetness.

“Goodness baby.” He murmurs, then takes a long appreciative lick between your folds. You moan aloud, canting your hips up as pulls away, chuckling to himself. He crawls up your body, hands caressing your skin. He presses a kiss to your collarbone, feels you grinding against his torso and he looks right into your eyes when he asks, “You gonna be a good girl and let me make love to you?”

You whine out, nearly crying with relief. He’s finally going to fuck you. You nod eagerly, and Shawn stands, making quick work of stripping down. “Condom?” He asks.

“I have an IUD.” You say.

Shawn raises a brow. “A what?”

“It’s a form of birth control.” You laugh at him a little. “I can’t get pregnant. I’ve also been tested, so I’m fine without a condom.”

Shawn smiles. “I’m clean,” he says, answering your unspoken question. He climbs up the bed again, kisses you on your lips once. “And I love that you trust me with this…with you. I love you.”

You’re shocked into silence.

He winces after he says it, hangs his head and groans. “Fuck, I’m sorry. I wanted to say it but I didn’t want it to be during a moment like this. I was hoping for a more romantic moment.”

You grab his face, kissing his nose and smiling when his face scrunches up. “What’s more romantic than our first time together?” You take his silence as a moment to flip him over, straddling him and settling above him, taking his hard cock in your hand and slowly lowering onto it.

Shawn lets out a groan at the sensation, and your eyes shut, the stretch making you hiss out, moaning when he fills you to the brim. His hands fly to your hips as you begin to move, and you cry out, bracing yourself on your hands on either side of his head. It doesn’t take much until you’re a moaning mess, Shawn breathing heavily in your ear, letting out moans of his own each time your hips meets his, your clit brushing against his pubic bone and building a delicious friction.

There’s been so much pent up tension, that it’s not a surprise to you when you come, trembling above him and crying out, body shaking as Shawn holds you up, his hips rising off the bed and fucking you through your own orgasm as he chases his, bringing your hips down and locking them there as he comes, a loud groan followed by a string of curses leaving his lips. You can feel his cock pulsing inside of you as he does, body shaking with aftershocks as he holds you close.

“I promise I last longer than that.” He tells you, chuckling a little. “I think I just got so excited.”

You giggle. “It’s okay.” You kiss his temple, his nose, and then the spot under his chin, before resting your head on his chest. “I don’t love you any less.”

-

You smirk a little to yourself as Shawn meets your eyes from across the backyard, blatantly giving you a once over as you exit the pool before smiling wickedly at you. You blush, averting your gaze and making your way over to the bonfire, wrapping your towel around yourself before taking a seat between Willy and Kayla, putting some distance between you and Shawn so you don’t drag him into the house for another round.

The pool party has been going on for about an hour now, Zach, Kappy, Jimmy, Willy, Annie, Morgan, and Kayla had come over to join the festivities, Mat, Cody, and Shawn enjoying themselves by kicking around a soccer ball while Gabe mans the grill. Since the party started, Jacob’s been drinking a lot, and his behavior hasn’t been terrible thus far.

You and Shawn had been hanging on each other after for most of the party after your very intimate and romantic afternoon in bed, and you decided to take a quick dip in the pool with the girls to distract yourself from him.

Unbeknownst to you, every little look and flirty gesture, every time the two of you were within an inch of each other, which was most of the night, was making Jacob angrier and angrier by the second.

It was when he caught you and Shawn staring at one another again, Shawn smiling like a dope at you for probably the hundredth time tonight, that Jacob finally snapped.

“You guys are just _adorable_.” A voice says, words slurred but angry.

You turn your head away from Shawn, finding Jacob there and you start to smile at him, figuring he’s still being cordial despite the alcohol, but judging by the look on his face, he’s anything but.

“You should thank me.” Jacob says plainly to you.

“For what?” You ask.

“Well if it wasn’t for me, you and Shawn never would have ended up together.” He says plainly. From across the yard, Shawn looks uncomfortable, and there’s a silence that falls upon the group. “Isn’t that funny though?” Jacob continues. “Me of all people? Thanks to me, you guys are together.”

“Jacob.” Shawn warns, the same time you say “What do you mean?”

Everyone is staring at the three of you, watching you, waiting for your reaction. Out of the corner of your eye, you see Kappy moving closer to you before Zach stops him.

“Well Shawn never would have asked you out if I didn’t dare him to, if we didn’t make that bet. So I think that you should thank me. For making that bet with him.”

“What?” You ask. You can hear yourself - your voice is so small and it sounds foreign, so confused, weak, and pathetic.

“Aren’t you glad your friends could be here?” Jacob sneers, and your heart sinks.

_What the fuck is going on?_

Everyone is silent, watching you and Shawn and Jacob and Gabe, observing the madness as it unfolds. No one attempts to step in, to shut Jacob up, and he just keeps going.

“You didn’t know? He didn’t tell you? We could all see that there was  _something_  going on between you two. But I mean, you’re Gabe’s baby sister, so what could he  _possibly_  be interested in when it comes to you? So I decided to call him on it. I made a bet that he wouldn’t ask you out on a date, and that even if you went on a date, the two of you wouldn’t last a month. But you did, cause now it’s been what, almost a month and a half? But that’s just it, because it’s not real. He doesn’t love you. He never did. Your entire relationship is a lie. He’s only in it because I bet him five hundred dollars. And he won.”

_Jacob is drunk. He’s drunk and he doesn’t know what he’s fucking talking about._

You keep trying to say that in your head but the more you say it the more you know it isn’t true.

For once in his life, Jacob is telling the truth, and you want to kill him for it.

“And you know what else? I only call you the ‘golden snitch’ because  _Shawn_  came up with it first. That’s right,  _he_  came up with the nickname ‘golden snitch.’ He got it from Harry Potter, the fuckin’ nerd, and he was the one that said that ‘the golden snitch broke up the golden trio.’ So if you hate that name, if you wonder why I call you that and where I got it from, blame your ‘boyfriend.’ Cause it’s not my fault for once.”

You feel a hand on your lower back, and you turn, seeing Willy, almost forgetting that he was next to you, he’s pulling you out of your chair already when he whispers “I think I should get you out of here.”

Across the yard, you see Shawn. He’s standing there, staring at you, and the look on his face confirms everything that Jacob just said.

And your heart breaks - splintering and cracking and the sound is deafening - and you immediately take a step back, into Willy’s waiting grasp. Shawn’s face drops, frantically shaking his head, opening his mouth to say something.

But Gabe beats him to it.

“ _Are you fucking kidding me?_ ”

You don’t think you’ve ever heard Gabe so furious before. He charges toward Jacob first, but Mat, Cody, Zach, and Kappy immediately intervene, holding him back. Will pulls you away and parks you behind him, where Annie, Morgan, and Kayla step up, wrapping their arms around you as you start to cry.

“I’m so sorry,” Kayla whispers, and you cry even more, sobs leaving your throat.

“ _Let me fucking go!_ ” Gabe demands of the boys, pointing at Jacob. “You! You son of a fucking bitch! After everything I’ve done for you?! After all this time! This is the shit you pull?!”

“Gabe-” Shawn starts, and the second he does he instantly regrets it, because Gabe is then pushing against the four boys, and he’s about to break free when Mat stands in front of Gabe, effectively blocking him with his large frame and acting as Shawn’s human shield.

“Don’t you say  _shit_  to me!” Gabe yells, fighting against the boys, trying to launch himself at Shawn. “You’re my  _best fucking friend_ and you bet money on my  _baby sister_? Bet money so you could what, get into her fucking pants!”

“Gabe!” Cody shouts, yanking him back, but Gabe is relentless.

“I  _told_ you that if you  _ever_  hurt her that I’d fucking kill you! You don’t think I’m serious?!”

“Gabe I didn’t-”

“How could you bet money on my  _baby sister_ , is this a joke to you?! Because she’s worth more than all the money in the world and you  _do not_  deserve her! She is fucking  _priceless_  and you’re a  _dead man_ Shawn Mendes!”

“Gabe!” You call out, pleading with him. Your voice breaks as you call him, but it seems to do the trick, because he immediately snaps back, looking toward you, body no longer fighting the four boys holding him. He breaks free of them then strides over to you, pushing past Willy and the girls before pulling you into a tight hug, hiding your tear-streaked face from everyone else.

“Everyone get the fuck out.” Gabe says lowly, chest vibrating with anger. “Especially you, Shawn. Everyone just fucking  _leave_.”

You can hear feet shuffling, people gathering their things and heading back into the house through the patio doors, and not long after, there’s silence, letting you know everyone has left.

Or so you thought.

“Did I fucking stutter, Mendes?” Gabe asks. You can hear his angry heart beating in his chest, and you shove at him a little, starting to walk you both backwards to where you think the patio door is.

“ _Gabe_ ,” you plead. “No. He’s staying with us. He has nowhere to go.”

Gabe pulls back, standing firm, staring at you in disbelief. “After  _all this_ , you want me to have sympathy for him? You want to  _defend_  him?!

“I’m tired, Gabe,” you say. It’s all you can say, body feeling weak, betrayed, empty. Your mind is in a thousand places and you don’t know what you’re supposed to do or say and you feel like you might combust if you don’t get upstairs to your room. “Please, I’m tired.”

He frowns, but nods. “Fine. But in the morning, we’re talking about this. And by ‘we,’ I mean you and I, Shawn. So start fucking packing.”

You head into the house first, and run right upstairs to your room. On the way, you notice that Mathew and Cody are sitting on the couch, which is probably a good thing, and they both toss you apologetic looks as you pass, slamming your door shut behind you.

The boys can hear you begin to sob, throwing things around your room as Gabe and Shawn enter the house from the backyard. Your brother is undeniably furious, The fact that Jacob would do this, that Shawn would do this, and he considers those idiots his best friends, it’s so fucked up.

And Gabe knows just by looking at Shawn how apologetic he is and wants to be, but who fucking cares. He’s lucky Mat and Cody hung back because if they didn’t, Shawn would probably be out cold right now and Gabe would be icing his bloody knuckles.

“I should kill you where you stand.” Gabe says, rounding on him.

Shawn winces. “Gabe, I can explain, I-”

“I don’t want to fucking hear it. I told you plenty of times what would happen if you hurt her, and you clearly didn’t fucking care.”

“I  _do_  care!” Shawn insists. “I’m in love with her Gabe! I am! That bet was stupid, it was childish, and it meant nothing to me. I gave the money back to him.”

“If it meant nothing why didn’t you tell her? Why didn’t you tell Jacob to fuck off? Why did it take some idiotic bet for you to grow the balls to step to my sister?” Shawn is silent, so Gabe continues on. “You know how much she hates Jacob. Even I do, and maybe it’s my fault that I let him around this summer, but the both of you are at fault for what just happened. Both of you have a hand in this. This isn’t some stupid nineties movie, Shawn. This is real life. This is my baby sister, I’m your best friend, and you royally fucked this up.”

Shawn starts to apologize again, but Cody rises from his spot on the couch. “I think you should stay with us, Shawn.”

“Yeah,” Gabe interjects. “Just for the night, so you can-”

“No.” Cody says, shaking his head. “Not for the night. Till your parents get home in a few weeks. Mat and I were just talking, and we were thinking of getting a hotel for the rest of the summer. Stay away from Jacob, and all. Maybe you should come with us.”

Shawn starts to protest, but Gabe narrows his eyes, silencing him. “I think that’s a good idea.” He says. “I think it’s for the best that you just go.”

There’s a tense moment where an uncomfortable, but thick and heavy silence falls on the group. Shawn’s about to protest again when your choked sob, muffled a little by your door, echoes through the living room, and Shawn hangs his head, silently agreeing as he ascends the stairs, starting to pack his things.


	8. Chapter 8

Two weeks later, Shawn’s family ends up coming home early from London. He leaves the hotel he was sharing with Mat and Cody and goes home. When his parents ask him about Gabe, and about you, he says nothing.

What could he possibly say?

Gabe hasn’t spoken to Shawn since that night of the pool party. According to Zach, he saw Gabe and Jacob run into each other in the parking lot of the gym, and Gabe didn’t hesitate - he decked Jacob square in the face, knocking him to the ground in one punch before getting in his car and leaving. From what you could interpret, no one seemed to help Jacob either.

Gabe also made a promise to spend the rest of the summer with you, an opportunity for you both to get closer as siblings, one, so you didn’t feel alone, and two, to spend time together before he goes back to school in the fall.

He’s also become extra protective - he doesn’t like if you just go out with Annie, Morgan, and Kayla anymore, saying that he feels a lot better when one of your guy friends is there with you, especially Willy.

You haven’t fought him on it, haven’t really had the energy to.

This wasn’t what you expected at all, and trying to get a grasp on the situation, trying to accept the fact that Shawn played you, it wasn’t easy.

Just hours before it was revealed to you that it was all a lie, he had been inside you for the first time. He had made love to you, told you that he was in love with you, and it was all a lie.

All of it. You were nothing more than five hundred dollars to him.

You spent hours scrubbing your skin under scalding hot water, hoping to erase the memory of Shawn, but each time you dried off, you could still feel the ghost of his touch. This body, your body, felt alien to you, and when you looked in the mirror, you could barely recognize yourself.

You were never this torn up over Brady, or Willy.

The scent of Shawn was still on your pillows and sheets, so you bought a brand new bed set, folding up the old one and hiding it away in the hall closet with all the other extra blankets and pillows. Once Shawn moved all of his stuff out, you locked the door to his room, shutting the memory of him away as best as possible.

But it was still no use. You felt the absence of him everywhere. This was the boy you fell for the fastest, the one you let in the easiest because you knew each other the best. You thought he wanted you, thought he loved you, thought you meant something to him.

 _You’re just a sucker for love._  You tell yourself.  _A pathetic sucker._

The car is quiet as you and Gabe drive, the night time air blowing through the car, and you sigh, watching how the street lights illuminate the shops downtown. They’re as vacant as you feel.

“Mom and dad come home next week, right?” He asks, and you nod your head, not looking at him.

“Yep, on Wednesday night.”

He murmurs his agreement, and silence falls on the car again.

“I’m really sorry.” Gabe says suddenly, and you stare at him.

“What?”

Gabe takes a glance at you before focusing on the road. “I’m sorry about Shawn, about Jacob, about everything. I’m sorry that I couldn’t stop it, Guppy.”

“Don’t call me that.” You spit, pausing when you see a flash of pain on his face. “Why  _do_  you call me that anyway?”

He gives a small smile at the memory in his head. “When mom first told me that I was gonna be a big brother, the way she did it was that she showed me the ultrasound, and said that the baby was the size of a guppy. Mom and dad kept calling you that - whenever they talked about the baby, they would call you ‘Guppy,’ because they wanted the sex of the baby to be a surprise. And then when you were born, you were so small, it just stuck.”

You’d never heard that story before, and the fact that Gabe still remembers that after all this time surprises you a little. He’s the most annoying person in your life and half the time you want to kill him, but the older you both get, the better your relationship as siblings becomes. “But we aren’t kids anymore, Gabe.”

“No. But no matter how much of a bitch you are or an asshole I am, we’re still siblings. And no matter how much you annoy me or make me wish I was an only child, at the end of the day you’re still that little guppy in a picture, and I’m still you’re brother, and I’m supposed to protect you. I’m sorry I haven’t been doing a very good job of it.”

“You can’t protect me forever.”

He frowns at that. “Fucking watch me. You don’t get to dictate how long I get to be your brother.”

Gabe pulls into the parking lot of Charlotte’s, pointing at you as if to say “stay here” while he goes inside to pick up your take out order. You roll your eyes, propping your elbow up on the little compartment between the driver and passenger seat, resting your head on your hand. Your phone vibrates in the pocket of your sweatpants, and when you pull it out you see that you have several messages, a few missed calls, and a voicemail.

There’s texts from Mathew, Jimmy, Willy, and a few messages from your group chat with the girls, and the missed calls are from your mom, Zach, and a missed call and voicemail from Shawn.

Your heart pounds in your chest, makes it ache. He hasn’t reached out to you since that night, so seeing his name on your screen is a lot. Reluctantly, you press play on the voicemail, Shawn’s voice filling the car.

“Baby,” he pleads. His voice is thick, and you can tell he’s been crying. “Baby please, I…I know that I don’t deserve you, I don’t deserve to hear your voice or be around you but I  _miss_  you. I  _need_ you, and I love you. Fuck! I love you so much that not being around you  _hurts_. I did a shitty thing, I know, but none of it was fake. Everything I said, everything I did, everything  _we_  did was real, and if you’d just let me explain, I swear to you, I can make it better.” There’s a pause, and Shawn chokes out another sob. “Please baby, I can explain. Just let me explain. Let me see you, let’s talk this out and let me make it better. Please. I love you so much.”

And the message ends.

You take a sharp inhale yourself, and a wet drop lands on your shirt. You didn’t realize you’d been crying, and you quickly wipe away your tears, sucking in a breath and getting your feelings in check as you see Gabe on his way back to the car.

Though you’re thankful that Gabe has been trying to distract you, thankful to your friends for keeping you busy and distracted, the truth is that you really miss Shawn, and you really wish things hadn’t gone to shit because you really love him. Despite all the hurt, despite the fact that he doesn’t deserve it, you still love him, you’re still in love with him.

But Jacob is right about one thing - it was all a lie. All of it. So there’s no point.

-

“Thank you, come again.” You say, handing the customer their food order with one hand and their change in the other, plastering another fake smile on your face before looking down, trying to shut the register drawer, but it’s stuck again.

You can hear that customer leave as another approaches, and from next to you, you feel Zach nudge your side, quietly mumbling your name in warning. You think he’s being a little shit like he has been all day, so you ignore it for a second as you fiddle with the drawer, slamming it shut.

You make sure the till is closed before you look up to greet the next customer, and when you do, the fake smile on your face drops, expression softening a little, shock and surprise evident when you say “Brady.”

“Hey.” He says. You haven’t heard his voice in months, haven’t seen him since graduation. He’s cut his hair a bit, just as tall as you remember but a little more muscular. Seeing him again doesn’t do anything to your heart, doesn’t make you miss him, doesn’t make you feel anything romantic. It’s like seeing an old friend after a while, and to be honest? Seeing him makes you a little happy, different from the shitty things you’ve been feeling these past couple of weeks.

“Hi,” you respond, looking at the touch screen of the register. “The usual?” You ask him.

He raises a brow in surprise. “You remember my ‘usual’ order?”

You scoff. “Don’t be so flattered,” you say, tone friendly so he knows you’re only kidding. “You only got  _your_  usual order because you copied  _my_  usual order.”

Brady laughs at that, scratching the back of his neck nervously. “Yeah, uh…are you on break soon?”

You glance at the clock, pleased at how fast your shift has gone by. “I’m actually off in about ten minutes. Why?”

“Figured we could talk, catch up, maybe? Jimmy uh…Jimmy mentioned something to me, and I wanted to come and see how you were doing.”

Oh. Jimmy told Brady about Shawn…and Brady wanted to check in on you. You turn your head to look at Zach, but find him missing, probably gone to the back, and you shake your head. “Yeah, sure. Sounds good. I can meet you somewhere?”

“Sure,” he says. “The beach sound okay?”

“Sounds great.”

“Great,” he says. “Then I’ll take two of the usual, one for me, one for you, and I’ll meet you at the beach.”

-

You chuckle at Brady’s joke, forgetting how much he made you laugh without even trying. You take another bite of your coconut chicken tender, trying not to choke on the piece as you swallow and take a swig of your root beer, placing it next to you on the dock.

He stares at you, a fond expression crossing his features, smiling absently as you return your focus to him.

“What?” You ask. “Do I have crumbs on my face?”

Brady shakes his head. “I just forgot how much I missed your laugh.” He leans in, kissing your forehead. “I miss having you around.”

The intimacy of the moment makes you shrink back a little. “I miss you too, Brady.” You say. “Your friendship, I mean, because-”

“I know.” He laughs. “There’s a reason you dumped me, and I don’t blame you.” He’s quiet when he says “But you’re friends with Willy, why not be friends with me too?”

“We  _are_  friends Brady.”

“Then why haven’t I seen you all summer?”

You shrug. “Could ask you the same. I see Jimmy nearly everyday.”

“Touche.” He says.

You’re aware that this conversation could be an identical one you have with Shawn down the road maybe, and that thought kind of hurts you. Brady is different - you loved him but you definitely weren’t  _in love_ , and being “just friends” with Brady is a lot easier than being “just friends” with Shawn.

You don’t know if you could ever be “just friends” with Shawn again.

“Jimmy says you had a pretty messy breakup a couple weeks ago. Said that Gabe nearly killed him trying to get to your boyfriend…er…ex boyfriend.”

You look down, focusing on the water below your feet as you and Brady sit on the dock. “Yeah. It was pretty terrible.”

“He made a bet, Jimmy said?”

“Yeah. Five hundred dollars that he wouldn’t ask me out and that we wouldn’t last a month.”

“How long did you last?”

“Month and a half.” You shrug. “He asked me to be his girlfriend.”

“Did you guys, did you um-”

“Yeah. Yeah we did.”

“Shit.” Brady curses. “I’m really sorry. You don’t deserve that. Did he apologize?”

The voicemail Shawn left you the other day pops into your head. “He’s trying to. I haven’t spoken to him though.”

“Do you want to? Talk to him, I mean.”

You’re starting to get a little annoyed. “I don’t know. Why does it matter?”

Brady frowns. “Because I still care about you even if I’m not your boyfriend. And it sounds like the one you got after me - who I was surprised that it wasn’t Willy, by the way - wasn’t much better to you or for you than I was. And that’s just…no matter what the terms, I wanted better for you. I still do. We both know you were too smart for me, way too mature, and that I couldn’t keep up with you. We’ve been friends for so long, and I’ll always have your back, even if I’m being an idiot. So it matters because you were  _supposed_  to upgrade after me, and then ten years down the road, I’d be at your wedding, watching you get married and being happy and I’d get to go up to you and say ‘hey remember that one time when we were eighteen,’ and you’d laugh and name one of your kids after me-”

“I would do no such thing.”

“-And I’d get to be cool uncle Brady for the rest of my life.” He finishes, smiling widely at you. There are tears in your eyes at his sincerity, and he wraps an arm around you, pulling you to his side. “You’re gonna be fine. I promise. And if it’s meant to be that you and him get back together, then it’ll happen. But for now, don’t be so hard on yourself. Live a little, and eat the rest of your chicken tenders, or I will.”

-

“They’re here!” Gabe calls out.

You drop your book on your bed and run out into the hall, and smiling widely at your parents, run down the stairs and into the arms of your mother. She hugs you tight and presses a kiss to your hair, and you can tell she’s smiling when she says “I missed you too.”

You hug your dad next, laughing a little when you pull back, and he says “Since when do either of you miss us this much?”

Your mother looks around the living room, confused look on her face. “Where’s Shawn?”

At his name, your heart does this weird sore pounding in your chest. Gabe chimes in for the both of you. “His family came home early from London, so he went back.”

“Oh well that’s nice,” your mother says. “Did the three of you have a good time together?”

You plaster the fakest smile you can manage, one you normally save for customers, and say “Yep, loads of fun.”

“That’s good.” Your dad says. “I knew I could trust that boy to keep you both in line.”

You and Gabe exchange a look as you help your parents bring their bags to their room, a silent vow never to mention the events of this summer to them ever in your lives.

You’re helping Gabe put his packed boxes into his car to bring to the post office. He’s mailing most of his stuff to his apartment in Boston so that way when it comes time to move, all he’ll have to worry about is his suitcase, and little things he’ll need to buy once he’s back there.

The boys leave in about three weeks to head back to Boston University to start their senior year, and as far as you’ve heard from your texts with Mat and Cody, Gabe and Shawn are still planning to live together, Mat and Cody living with them, and Jacob apparently has been kicked off the lease. None of the boys want to live with him, be friends with him, or see him ever again.

Not that it matters to you, anyway.

Gabe’s also been good about helping you get your stuff for school, even though you’re not actually dorming there. The UoT is about half an hour away, so you’ll be commuting, but he’s insistent on at least getting you prepared as far as books and supplies.

This summer has definitely brought the two of you closer, and it’s definitely changed the way that you view him as a brother. You were always close growing up, despite that whole situation when he was sixteen, but this is still Gabe, he’s always got your back, and you can’t thank him enough, and you know for a fact that of all the times you’ve sent him off to college, this will by far be the hardest goodbye, and it’s still three weeks away.

You also want to say goodbye to Shawn, despite your broken heart, but can’t bring yourself to see him, can’t bring yourself to reach out, and you know for sure if you ever saw him again, you’d run right back into his arms.

And you can’t do that. And you won’t do that. Because no matter if this was all a lie, no matter if he’s actually sorry or if he actually loves you, you don’t know if you’ll ever get Jacob’s words out of your mind.

_It’s not real. He doesn’t love you. He never did. Your entire relationship is a lie. He’s only in it because I bet him five hundred dollars. And he won._

He won. You lost.


	9. Chapter 9

Shawn swallows his pride and knocks on the front door, feeling both nervous and confident having seen that only Gabe’s car sits in the driveway.

He can hear footsteps approach as the light behind the peephole changes, and as the door flies open Shawn braces his face for impact.

“Shawn.” Gabe says, tone unreadable. “What are you doing here?” And then, Gabe’s eyes narrow, and he closes the door, blocking Shawn’s view of the house. “My sister isn’t here.”

Shawn shakes his head. “No, I uh…I came to talk to you, actually.”

“You can’t come in.” Gabe says, closing the door a little more.

“I don’t have to. We can go somewhere else? Maybe the high school?”

At that, Gabe’s face softens a little.

Whenever Gabe or Shawn needed to speak to one another as best friends, as brothers, they would meet at the outdoor track at their high school and sit on the bleachers and talk, and sometimes, if it was bad or really serious, the boys would run laps around the track and exhaust themselves until they were calm enough to talk. As they entered college, they did sort of the same, but lately they’d taken to running down Commonwealth and back up again, sometimes running from Agganis to Fenway and finding their way to the MFA before circling back.

Gabe remembers his first breakup with Diana at fifteen and how he was so torn up because he’d never experienced a pain like that, didn’t know how to deal with it, he ran just about two dozen laps before he could stop crying, another dozen before he calmed down, and by the time he actually stopped running he felt like his heart was ready to leap out of his chest. Shawn ran right next to him the entire time, step for step and when Gabe poured his heart out, Shawn was there, and he listened, giving Gabe his best advice despite never going through heartbreak before.

He remembers when Shawn got dumped for the first time at seventeen, how he had never seen Shawn cry before that, but how much he sobbed for Lauren, how Shawn believed in love at first sight and wanted something long term but it just didn’t work. Shawn ran and ran and ran and ran and Gabe felt bad for not being able to keep up with him, so he sat on the bleachers after about lap twenty and waited for Shawn till he was ready to talk. And when Shawn was ready, he just cried.

Through any bad situation in their lives, Shawn and Gabe would lean on each other, run it out, talk it out, and do their best to support the other.

And of course, for Shawn, this was a situation that qualified. It technically did for Gabe, too.

So despite the anger in his body, Gabe nods, says “I’ve gotta get changed, but you go ahead. I’ll meet you at the tracks in like ten minutes.”

-

Shawn’s waiting in the driver’s seat of his Jeep, soaking in the AC and readying his body to run laps in the summer sun, dealing with the heat of the rubber track and his varying degrees of emotion.

He’s picking at his workout shorts, his shirt resting in his backseat - figures he’d get rid of it after the first lap anyway. He’s also running down the list of things in his head that he wants to say to Gabe that won’t earn him a punch in the face, but none of it sounds right, so it looks like he’s just going to have to wing it.

Gabe’s car pulls up next to his about a minute later, and they nod at each other, getting out of their cars and onto the track. Shawn takes off running, figures he could use the adrenaline to hype himself up, and Gabe meets him step for step. The sun is strong today, so it doesn’t take much for either boy to start sweating - Shawn can feel it on his scalp, affecting his curls and Gabe’s dark hair begins to stick to his forehead.

They run a few laps before Gabe stops, shoving Shawn’s shoulder once and says “I  _really_  fucking hate you right now.”

Shawn winces. “You have every right to.”

Gabe seethes. “I know, that’s why I’m telling you.” He pauses, another angry look crossing his features when he says “What the  _fuck_  were you thinking, asshole? Why would you - how could you do that? To my  _sister_ of all fucking people?”

“Gabe, I-”

“Don’t answer that yet.” Gabe says, and takes off. Shawn stays in place as Gabe does another two laps, and when Gabe joins him again, Shawn speaks first.

“I can’t even begin to apologize for my mistakes. I can’t. And I know that no amount of ‘I’m sorry’ is going to fix or change what happened. All I can do is explain myself. You don’t have to believe me, you don’t have to do anything else, just hear me out.”

Gabe nods once, keeps his mouth shut.

“Jacob was getting on my fucking nerves. He could tell that I liked her, he could tell that I was interested and it bothered him. He wouldn’t shut up about it and when he confronted me, he was so disgusted. I lied to brush it off, to get him off my back. I told him I wasn’t interested, but he called me on it. He made the bet and I agreed because I was being stupid. I wasn’t thinking, I was just so fed up with him I did what I could to get him off of my back. Nothing about the bet and what I did with your sister-”

“Please  _don’t_  talk about what you ‘did’ with my sister.”

Shawn winces again. “I didn’t mean it like that. I meant the dates, the gifts, my feelings, none of that was fake, Gabe. None of it. My feelings for your sister are real and they’re not going away. And you’re right, I’m an idiot and you have every right to hate me, to want to kill me, but you should know I gave the money back to Jacob. Every dollar. He was upset that I actually love your sister and he threatened to come clean, and I figured he was only doing it because of the fact that he lost, so I gave it back to him. I  _told_  Jacob that no amount of money would change how I felt about her, no amount of money could make me stop loving her, and that’s the truth Gabe.”

“I know that I had no reason to make that bet. I know that. And I know that I’m an asshole, that I should’ve told Jacob to go fuck himself and I should’ve just ignored him, but the bet wasn’t made until after you already knew how I felt about her. You knew that I liked her - that was already established.”

“Then why lie to Jacob about it if it was established? Why let him get to you like that?” Gabe insists. “You should’ve just told him to fuck off, and even if you didn’t, you could’ve told my sister the truth about the bet and about your feelings, about how you already had your heart set on her before the bet was even made and then you could’ve given  _her_  the money just to rub it in Jacob’s stupid fucking face. Why didn’t you tell my sister? Why didn’t you tell her the truth?! Fuck!” Gabe explains. He takes off on another lap, but sprints it, and when he’s in front of Shawn again, he shoves him one more time.

“You’re such a fucking idiot Shawn!”

“I know.” Shawn says.

“I should run you over.”

“I know.”

“And you’d let me, wouldn’t you?”

Shawn nods. “Without question.”

Gabe stares at him for a second, then shakes his head. “You gotta understand where I’m coming from, Shawn. Think about it. If it was me, and I did this shit to Aaliyah, you’d kill me without question.” Shawn’s jaw clenches on reflex and Gabe nods, pointing at him. “Exactly!”

“I know, I know.” Shawn laments. “I get it, I do. But I…I’ve loved her for awhile, Gabe.”

“How long?”

“Since Spring Break. London.”

“Jesus fucking Christ, Shawn.” Gabe curses, hands flying to his hair and gripping at the dark strands in disbelief. “Are you shitting me? She’d been eighteen for two months!”

Shawn winces. “I know. I know it’s bad but it doesn’t change how I feel.”

Gabe takes a minute, breathing deeply and squeezing his eyes shut. “You keep saying that. You keep saying that but it doesn’t make sense. If you love my sister, then you shouldn’t have made that bet.”

“I know Gabe. And I’m sorry. I should’ve been honest, and you have every right to hate me.”

“As much as I want to, I don’t hate you. Not really.” He sighs, staring at Shawn and gesturing to the space in between them. “What do you want, Shawn? Why’d you drag me to the track? I know you wanted to explain and apologize, but what else?”

Damn Gabe for being able to read Shawn like a book. “If you’d let me,” Shawn starts, knowing he has to tread carefully. “I just want to see her. Take her on one last date, just to apologize, answer the questions I know she has, let her know that I genuinely love her, that I wasn’t lying about my feelings. One last chance. I want to tell her the truth - that I’m an idiot who made a mistake and I just want her to know that I love her despite what may happen next.”

Gabe is reluctant, Shawn can see that. He’s expecting a no, braces himself for it, but instead Gabe says “I’m not speaking for my sister. Ultimately, it’s  _her_  decision as to whether or not you get a second chance. But if she does give you one, you’d better not fuck it up. I mean it this time Mendes - you fuck this up and I won’t hesitate.”

-

You’re out with Morgan, Kayla, Brady, Willy, and Jimmy when your phone vibrates in your pocket.

There’s a feeling of shock as your heart beats hard, stomach twisting when you see Shawn’s name on your screen.

**Can we talk?**

You frown. You miss him something terrible, but you don’t know that you’re ready to see him just yet.

**No, Shawn. Absolutely not**

You’re still trying to navigate your feelings, don’t know that you can completely trust him. He lied to you. He bet on you. He wasn’t honest about any of it and you just…

You fell for him. Hard. And this whole situation broke your heart.

Does he deserve your time?

**Please, I just want to see you. To apologize for what I did. I want you back. And if you won’t take me back, then at least give me a chance to be your friend.**

Remembering what Will said to you earlier in the summer, you text back your reply, a finality to your words, a lot harsher than you intended. 

**There’s a difference between being worthy of being my friend, and being worthy enough to be WITH me. And Shawn, you are neither of those things.**

-

Gabe knows for a fact that Shawn texted you, mostly because Shawn just sent the screenshot of your conversation. You rejected him, _hard_ , and Shawn isn’t taking it very well if the succession of messages Gabe is receiving is any indication.

**I know you said it was up to her but Gabe I cannot lose her**

**You have to help me**

**Please**

Gabe also knows for a fact that while you’re angry, there’s no real weight to your words, because you just got back from hanging out with your friends and he can hear you crying. He’s heard you cry enough times to know this is the kind of cry where you’re upset things didn’t go the way you wanted them to - instant thoughts of him being a shitty kid and getting his way and rubbing it in your face surface, and he sighs.

As your older brother, Gabe definitely doesn’t want you to be upset, and he doesn’t want to deal with a mopey Shawn back at school, so he knows it’s time to put on some Scooby-Doo and get to meddling.

The next morning, thoroughly feeling like Freddy and leader of Mystery Inc, while your parents are out, he approaches you in the kitchen and asks if you’d want to go to a “goodbye lunch for siblings” at 1428 later that afternoon, when really he won’t be there, and it’ll just be you and Shawn together.

Once you agree, Gabe nods, then excuses himself, shooting a text to Shawn.

**You’d better thank your lucky stars that I’m your best friend because you owe me big time. Get your shit together because you’ve got one chance to get my sister back.**

Shawn’s reply comes seconds later.

**What do I have to do?**

Gabe smiles mischievously to himself.

**Buckle up Mendes. I’ve got the plan to beat all plans.**

-

You figured since you were just meeting Gabe he wouldn’t care that you looked like basic poop in your worn Toronto Maple Leafs shirt tucked into your ratty high waisted shorts, hair in a messy bun.

You walk into 1428 and give your name to the host, like Gabe told you to do, and the host just smiles, gesturing for you to follow them. They lead you to the open back patio of the restaurant, where it’s deserted, no one at any table save a mess of curly hair at a table in the back, and at the sound of your approach, the head of curls looks up, right into your eyes, and smiles.

“Hi baby.” He says, and the way he says it - like he’s called you that everyday for the past year - lights a furious blaze in your body, anger seeping through you quickly. You can’t help the scowl that appears on your face, can’t help the tears that pool in your eyes and spill over.

You want to scream and yell and stomp out of this restaurant as fast as you possibly can, ready to call Gabe and start screaming at him for doing something so mean to you - setting you up so you could be alone with the man who broke your heart, who you’ve been missing so terribly, wishing things would go back to the way they were minus the lie - and you’re starting to resent Shawn’s entire existence. How  _dare_  Gabe do this to you - you weren’t kids anymore, and these little pranks weren’t funny anymore, and your feelings weren’t something people could play around with anymore.

Spinning on your heels, you try to get your feet to move quickly, trying to make a break for it when soft fingers encircle your wrist, and you’re yanked back like a dog on a leash, body crashing into his chest.

“Baby, wait,” he pleads, and you round on him, eyes narrowed and venom dripping from your tongue.

“ _Don’t_  call me that.” You spit, ripping your arm from his grasp. “I am  _not_ your ‘baby.’ You made that very clear.”

He frowns, reaching for you again but you take a step back, out of his grasp. “Please, just-”

“ _No._ ” You say. “I don’t know what sick game you’re playing but I don’t want any part of it.”

“What?” He says now, face puzzled. “What are you talking about? I’m not playing any games.” He insists. “Gabe knew that this was the only way I could get you alone to talk, and I-”

“Did you think that maybe I  _don’t want_  to talk to you?” You retaliate, taking another step back. You thought for sure that after all this time, seeing him again, you’d run right back into his arms and forgive him like nothing ever happened, so you’re incredibly surprised at your own resolve.

“You’re right.” He sighs. It’s slightly frustrating that he’s not getting angry with you. The higher your fire climbs, the calmer the seas of his mind becomes. “You don’t have to talk to me. You don’t have to say a single word. But could you at least listen to me? I’m sure you have questions, and I have answers, if you’re willing to listen.” He gestures to the table behind him, where he was sitting when you came in, and you grumble slightly under your breath.

He’s right.

You stalk wordlessly to the seat across from his, plopping down with a sigh, and he takes his seat, placing his forearms on the table. “I made a mistake.”

Oh. That wasn’t what you expected him to say. “Go on.”

“I messed up, it was stupid, but you know that. And I never should’ve done that, I never should have made that bet, I was being a stupid boy, I can’t even give you a valid reason for it, but everything that happened before - me kissing you, telling you that I had feelings for you, the first night I spent in your bed - all of that was real. I made that bet to shut Jacob up, but nothing about my actions, my words, my feelings - none of that was influenced by that bet. None of it.”

He takes a chance, reaches across the table and takes your hand, squeezing it tight. “It was all  real. Taking you on dates, buying you things, everything that I’ve ever said to you, everything that we did, the way I kissed you, when we were intimate -  _all of that was real._ And the only reason Jacob made the bet in the first place was because he noticed that I had a crush on you, and that I was interested in you. He thought I didn’t have the guts to ask you out, and I proved him wrong. And when he realized that I actually liked you, that I wanted you, he got angry. I gave the money back to him, every single dollar. I told him that no amount of money was going to change the fact that I was in love with you.”

Shawn scoots his chair closer, leans in when he says “I gave the money back, because it wasn’t worth it. The bet was stupid, and I didn’t want to lose you. And I know that despite all of that, I still fucked up because I  _lied_  and that hurts more than anything else, and I understand that, and I’m not upset at you for being upset with me. I’m just as angry with myself. But I need you to know that my feelings for you are real, they’ve always been real, and despite Jacob’s bet, none of that has changed. I liked you way before the bet, liked you the entire time and when I started to fall for you it was all real - still is real. Everything I did was honest and genuine and not driven by the bet, and it shouldn’t have taken me a stupid bet to push me to ask you out and take you on a date.”

He hangs his head. “But it did. And I regret that, which is why I gave the money back. Because my feelings for you mean more to me than winning a bet, because there’s no point in winning anything if it means that I don’t have you. I love you and I never should have let Jacob get in the way of that.” He pauses, then looks up, right into your eyes and he takes both of your hands in his when he says “I’ve been in love with you since spring break.”

That takes you by surprise.

“I woke up and you were just in our kitchen, making breakfast, and you didn’t know I was there yet, but you just standing there in your PJs like you belonged there, like I’d woken up to something like that before and I just thought ‘I want  _this_  for the rest of my life.’ I never said anything because I knew Gabe would kill me, and I thought it was just a small thing, but it wasn’t. Because the first day of summer, when we came home, when I went to see you at King Cone, when I saw you in that bikini and kissed you that night - I knew there was no way that I could ever  _not_  feel something for you. I fell in love with you in London. I’m still in love with you now. And I know I’ve done a shitty job at showing it, and no amount of apologies will ever fix what I did to you. But I need you to know, that I am sorry, and that if you give me a chance, I promise I’ll make it up to you, that I won’t make you regret it, that I’ll be a better man. I will grovel and beg and-”

“Shawn.” You say, squeezing his hands and shutting him up. Your voice is shaky, trying not to break down at his words. You’re still angry, have every right to be, but you miss him, you love him, and you know Gabe wouldn’t have set this up if he didn’t already talk to Shawn, if he didn’t already know that Shawn was telling the truth, if he didn’t already know that Shawn was in love with you and wanted to fix things.

He’s quiet, waiting for you to speak, and you can see in his eyes that he’s praying you don’t banish him and his entire existence from your life.

“I’m not saying that it’ll be easy. I understand now, I do, but it still hurts. And I’m not denying the fact that I’m in love with you too. I love you, Shawn. Okay?” He’s waiting for a ‘but,’ but you don’t have one. “It’s going to take a little bit to get over this, but if you really want this to work-”

“I do!”

You giggle a little, can’t help it and he smiles at your smile. “Then I’ll give you one last chance. But one last chance is all you get, Shawn. I love you, but if you lie like that again I-”

Your words are cut off with the feeling of Shawn’s soft lips against yours, his hands cupping your face as he moves gently, not pushing but giving you time to pull away if you want to.

But you don’t.

You’ve missed him, and being angry at someone you love and want nothing more than to just cuddle and kiss and be with is exhausting. He did wrong, he made a mistake, but there’s no use holding a grudge over his head anymore.

So you kiss him back, hoping he gets the message that despite the bullshit, and despite whatever bullshit you may go through from this point on, you still love him, and you’re not going anywhere.


	10. Chapter 10

You check the time on your phone for the tenth time, pocketing it with a sigh and still hoping that he’d actually show up. You’d been debating the past ten minutes on why you decided to do this, why you decided to be the bigger person and reach out, but you knew that if you didn’t, he never would. He no doubt hates you now more than he ever did before, but you wanted the chance to say your peace, leave the past behind you both.

Gabe offered to come with you, but you declined. Opted for meeting at King Cone while Jimmy and Willy and Zach worked the inside registers. They’d be able to watch and intervene if necessary, and you didn’t miss Brady sitting in the corner either - hiding under a baseball cap and sunglasses, trying to be discrete, hoping you didn’t notice.

The bell of the door draws your attention, as well as the attention of the boys behind the counter, and in saunters the man of the hour. He’s wearing black sweatpants and a grey hoodie, the hood drawn up over the hat he’s wearing on his head. When he spots you, he sits down across from you in the booth, removing his hood, but keeping his hat, the brim hiding his eyes from you.

“Hey.” He murmurs, doesn’t say much else or bother to look at you.

“Thanks for meeting me, Jacob,” you say. “I promise I won’t take too much of your time.”

He mumbles something you don’t catch, and you take that as your cue to keep talking. “I don’t really care if you don’t listen, or how you feel about me, or how angry you are at me, because I probably feel the exact same way about you, and at the end of the day, it’s miniscule compared to the rest of our lives.” 

He raises a brow at you in suspicion, but doesn’t interrupt. “I just want you to know that I’m not angry with you, or with Shawn, or with anyone. I’ve made peace with the situation, and with you. I get that I ruined your life when you were sixteen, and I’m sorry. Genuinely, I am. I didn’t know what was going on in your life, and I didn’t bother to care or ask, but I definitely didn’t intend on you being sent to boarding school. I was just trying to protect Gabe.”

You take another deep breath, letting all the words flow out of you. “All I knew was that you had done something wrong, and that Gabe was going to take the fall for you, and our parents would never look at him or Shawn the same way ever again if I didn’t step in and tell them the truth. I didn’t mean for you to get in trouble, I didn’t want your mom to be upset with you, and I didn’t want Gabe to have to lose you as a friend. I was just being his baby sister, and I was just trying to do my job and protect him.”

“I get that boarding school sucked, and you had to make new friends, and that you blamed me for it all. I get that, I honestly do. But to hold that grudge for all these years? To be angry at me for five years? Angry enough that you’d do whatever it took to get even with me? That’s…that’s something I don’t think I could fathom myself doing. But if it bothered you that much, to be angry enough that you had to be nice to me for few days in order for it to hurt me enough when you told me the truth…shit, I’m sorry Jacob. I really am sorry for the way I made you feel. I can’t take back what I did, and I probably wouldn’t, but I’m still sorry.”

“I know that Shawn and my brother are still angry with you, and I know Mat and Cody are angry with you too. I’ve tried to talk to them about it, tried to get them to talk to you, but I don’t think they will, not unless you make the first move and apologize.” You take a deep breath. 

“I know they kicked you off the lease. I’m sorry. And I don’t want that and this whole summer to be another reason you hate me, and I’m kind of sick of you doing things to make my life more difficult, so I’d appreciate it if you could just reach out to them, talk it out like the friends you are, and I’m sure things would work out.”

Jacob sits there and doesn’t say a word. His face is stoic, hands in the pocket of his hoodie as he stares at you. You don’t even know if he’s been listening to you at all, and figure this is a lost cause.

“Well,” you say. “That’s all I wanted to say to you. I just wanted to apologize for doing whatever it is I may have done to piss you off. But also to tell you that I forgive you, and that I’m not angry. I think you and I have wasted too much time being angry at one another, and everyone else but ourselves. If I don’t see you again, I hope that you’re happier from here on out, Jacob. I really do.”

With that, you sigh, exiting the booth and nodding once to Zach, Jimmy, and Willy to let them know you’re okay, and that you’re leaving. Jimmy nods once to Brady, who you can hear standing up behind you. You grab your keys and head for the door, but you’re stopped by a gentle touch of fingertips on your wrist.

You look down, finding Jacob staring up at you from under the brim of his hat, tears in his eyes. He lets his hand fall back to his lap, shaking his head before standing up. He towers over you a little, and you can see Brady start to step forward, but you wave him away with a shake of your hand.

“I’m sorry.” Jacob chokes out. “I’m so sorry. For everything. I’m not as articulate as you are, but I am sorry. For all of it. I don’t deserve your forgiveness, and you shouldn’t be apologizing to me at all. You’ve been nothing but kind to me and you’ve only ever tried to be civil, tried to do it for Shawn and your brother, tried to protect them, and I’ve been a total dick the entire time, and I’m sorry. I don’t know what else to say other than I’m sorry.”

You can’t ignore the feeling of shock that runs through you, and you feel sad. Sad because there’s probably more to Jacob than anyone ever realized, than you ever realized, and you see it now, in this boy who’s lost his best friends, who lost his father before, lost his childhood.

Instead of saying anything, you wrap your arms around him and pull him into a hug, wrapping your arms tight around his shoulders. You feel him stiffen at first, before he wraps his arms around you, hugging back just as tight. When you part, you both have tears in your eyes, and you laugh a little.

“Why don’t you come over to the house? My parents are out for the night, and Gabe invited Shawn, Mat, and Cody over for a barbeque. I don’t think they’d mind if you came over, and maybe it’d give you all a chance to talk.”

Jacob goes wide eyed. “You’re inviting  _me_  to the house?”

You shrug. “Why not?”

-

Shawn elbows Gabe in the side, laughing as Gabe dances around him in the kitchen. Gabe’s been hyper and loud all day and it’s starting to give the others a headache. “Knock it off, dipshit. I need to focus on this!”

“Cutting vegetables?” Gabe scoffs. “You can’t multitask, Mendes?”

“Will you two knock it off?” Cody demands from where he’s standing near the patio door, emptying beers into a cooler. “You’re giving me a headache!”

Mat rolls his eyes at the sink, trying to wash the large bowl he used to make the burger mix. “If all of you don’t shut the fuck up we can forget this barbeque and I’ll gladly go home to take a nap.”

Gabe opens his mouth to retaliate when he hears the front door open, and seconds later you appear in the kitchen doorway, and the look on your face reminds him of the time he was twelve and you had to break the news to him that you wrecked his bike.

He raises a brow at you, says “What’d you do, Guppy?”

You smile nervously. “I brought a friend over for the barbeque.”

Now it’s Shawn’s turn to raise a brow, “A  _friend_?”

Jacob enters the kitchen not long after, steps soft and quiet, almost as if he doesn’t tread carefully the floor will break beneath him. The silence at his arrival is almost deafening, and you clear your throat awkwardly. “I invited Jacob for dinner tonight.”

“Why?” Gabe demands.

“Because I asked him to meet me earlier at King Cone. And he did. And he apologized. And I forgave him. I think you should all do the same.”

None of the boys say anything, they just stare at you.

“Baby,” Shawn says, “I don’t-”

“I’m going to go upstairs.” You cut him off. “And change. And you guys can stay down here and talk, okay?”

You smile positively at all of them, and squeeze Jacob’s arm in reassurance as you pass him, and head upstairs. It’s silent until you close your bedroom door, and then you can hear Gabe yelling a little bit, pressing you ear to the door.

For the most part, it’s all mumbled and garbled through the wood, you can only hear a few words, but you know it’s best to leave it all alone.

You grab your laptop off of your desk and plug in your earbuds, figuring it would be best to just not eavesdrop and let the boys talk while you caught up on some Netflix. You know you dropped a bombshell on them just now, and judging by the look in Gabe’s eyes, you’re pretty sure he’d rather you tell him your were pregnant than bring Jacob home.

It’s two episodes of “Supergirl” later that you see your bedroom door open out of your peripheral vision, and Gabe comes through, Shawn trailing behind him, and when you take out your earbuds you hear the same laughter you heard earlier this summer echoing through the house downstairs.

“Everything okay?” You ask, small hopeful smile on your face.

Gabe jumps on your bed, yanking you down and into a hug, parting afre a moment. “Thanks, kid.” He says.

Shawn sits at the edge of your bed, smiling at you. “Everything’s fine.”

“And you’re all friends again?”

Gabe and Shawn nod. “Jacob apologized. Told us what you said to each other. That was really cool of you.” Gabe says, smiling. “You really didn’t have to forgive him, you know? Or bring him over here to talk to us…so…I guess what I’m trying to say is thanks for being my sister.”

Shawn nods in agreement. “And thank you for being a good person. Seriously.”

You shrug, “It was the right thing to do. It’s not good to hold grudges.”

Shawn leans forward and kisses your forehead gently. To which Gabe pouts, sticking his forehead up as if to ask for one too. Shawn scoffs, pushing Gabe’s face away. “Enough, you asshat. Get downstairs and get to the grill.”

“Fine, but I’m not leaving you two in here by yourselves. The last thing I need right now is to be an uncle.”

At that, you sort of flinch, because you know Gabe is only (half) joking, but you and Shawn have barely been dating that long, nevermind a conversation about kids, let alone marriage.

Shawn doesn’t miss a beat though, telling Gabe “Trust me, if that were the case, this conversation would be way too late.”

-

You carefully adjust the strap of the new baby blue wrap-dress Shawn just bought you, smoothing it down as you look in the mirror to make sure it looks perfect. Shawn said he was taking you somewhere special for dinner, and that it was a sort of fancy place, so you needed to dress the part. He did so by leaving a note on your bed saying as much, along with the dress, and a bouquet of sunflowers.

For the past two weeks you’d been going on you last summer dates with Shawn, given that he and the boys were leaving in a week to go back to school. It was nerve-wracking - the thought of starting a summer romance and having it end over long distance, but Shawn was positive that the two of you could make it work, and that you would make it work.

“I told you, I’m in love with you. So I don’t care what it takes, this relationship means everything to me and there isn’t anything I wouldn’t do to be with you.”

And that…well how could you doubt anything at all after that?

Shawn had even gone so far as to print out your academic calendar, his academic calendar, along with the tentative schedule for the Red Dogs - BU’s club hockey team that Shawn, Gabe, and Mat had been on since their freshman year. 

He sat with you with the schedules on the coffee table, as well as with your planner, and had marked down the dates that you’d be able to go and visit him. Once you both had course syllabi then you’d know if there’d be more dates to add, but so far, you had a decent idea of how much you’d be seeing him during the school year.

So far, the first visit would happen during BU’s homecoming weekend, and then he’d be back in town for Labor Day weekend, as well as American Thanksgiving - but that one was still tentative, just incase they had a last minute addition to the hockey schedule. 

Obviously he’d be home for the holidays, and Valentine’s Day was still in the works, but Shawn said he’d know more about that in the spring semester. 

You’d also both agreed to save up so you could go somewhere tropical for Spring Break, and that you’d be there for Senior night for the Red Dogs - to support him as well as Gabe and Mat.

Gabe has already assured you that since they’ll be living together that he’d keep Shawn in check, even Jacob told you the same, which was surprising. Obviously you and Shawn would FaceTime or Skype as much as possible, and you both promised that when you weren’t busy or in class or at work you’d try to text or call as much as you could.

You felt confident about it all, and it made you happy. You never expected this summer to go the way it did, but if it meant that in the end, you’d be standing here, getting ready to go to dinner with boy you were hopelessly in love with, it didn’t matter.

You hear the doorbell, letting you know that Shawn was there, but before you could even call out that you would go get it, you hear the front door open and your parents start talking, your mother and father laughing at something Shawn said.

You emerge from your room and lean over the railing, Gabe doing the same not long after, watching your parents interact with Shawn.

Telling them about the fact that you and Shawn were dating had been…interesting. 

You thought for sure they were going to freak out, assume the two of you had spent the summer acting like rabbits, but your mother was so relieved, saying “Well thank heavens you chose him,” and your father had just shrugged, and said “if it’s going to be any boy dating my daughter, at least it’s  _that_ boy.”

Gabe rolls his eyes when Shawn cracks another joke that makes your parents laugh, says “hey, stop trying to compete for favorite kid. That spot’s already taken.”

“Yeah,” you interject. “By _me_.”

Your parents and Shawn look up at the two of you, Shawn with a bright smile on his face when he sees you in your dress. Everyone else retreats as you gather your purse and your phone, heading outside and into Shawn’s Jeep. Shawn, ever the gentleman, opens your door for you, helping you up and into your seat before closing it and climbing into the driver’s seat, driving away.

He reaches across and laces his fingers with yours, resting them on the center console as soft music plays from his radio. Every now and again he catches a glance at you, smiles softly to himself then continues driving, and it’s like that the whole drive until he pulls into the parking lot of a large restaurant, big red lights of the sign that reads “Giorgio’s” illuminating the area in contrast with the dark orange hue of the sunset.

Shawn guides you in with a hand on the small of your back, greeting the host, who leads you to a table in the back. Shawn goes so far as to pull out your chair for you, and you giggle a little at his display of chivalry.

After you’ve ordered, you can’t help but pick up on the fact that Shawn’s nervous - his leg is bouncing up and down, he’s fidgeting with his silverware, and his eyes are on you, the surroundings - so you reach across the table and take his hands in yours, find them a little clammy.

“What’s wrong, babe?” You murmur.

He looks up at you in confusion. “Nothing’s wrong. Why?”

“You’re all antsy.” You point out. “Wondering how you’re going to afford this meal?”

Shawn smiles softly at your joke, shakes his head. “I’d spend every last dime on you if I could, you know that. I just…” His voice trails off for a second before he shrugs, and you hear him mumble “fuck it” before he pulls his hand back. “I wanted to do this the day I left, make it special, but I don’t think I can wait anymore because I’m worried you won’t like it.”

He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a little box, but before you can make any assumptions he opens it.

It takes a minute for you to figure out what it is, because you’re focused on Shawn’s face, which is focused on you and your reaction. When you manage to zero in on what he’s holding, you can’t help but gasp a little.

It’s a silver necklace with a little “S” in the middle, accompanied with a little sun charm, and at your smile, he pulls out a long chain from under his shirt, where the first initial of your first name dangles from, and he smiles. “I know that like matching things are very, uh, ‘high school esque’ but I thought it was…I don’t know, cute? It’s uh, supposed to represent our first summer together, and all the summers we’ll have together in the future. And I promise they’ll be better than the first.”

Your smile gets wider as you take the necklace from his fingers, examining the little charms in your palm. You’re so busy looking at it you almost miss Shawn clear his throat, and when you look up at him, you can see that the nerves are back in his eyes.

“Do you like it?” He asks, voice hopeful.

You nod, “I do, I really love it Shawn.”

“Would you like me to put it on for you?”

You nod, and it’s almost comical how quickly Shawn gets out of his chair and meets you on the other side of the table. You hand him the necklace, and he brings it around front, and you carefully maneuver your hair so he can clasp it together. The necklace falls and rests in the middle of your chest, slightly below your collarbones and above the neckline of your dress. It’s beautiful, and you don’t think you’ll ever take it off.

You think of what Shawn was saying - about how it’s for this summer, and all the summers you’ll get to have, and you know for a fact that despite everything that went on this summer, there’s no way you could ever forget it. 

Everything was so unexpected - you went into this summer thinking you’d be with Willy, but can’t help but be thankful that it didn’t work out. Hell, you’re even thankful for Jacob’s idiotic move, because if those things hadn’t happened, you never would have ended up with Shawn.

You never would have anticipated it, but this summer gave you Shawn, and it gave him you, and now here you are.

When Shawn sits back down, he’s smiling at you, and he takes your hand. You smile right back at him when you say “I want you to know I wouldn’t trade this summer for the world.”


End file.
